Papurau Newydd Cymru

Chwiliwch 15 miliwn o erthyglau papurau newydd Cymru

Cuddio Rhestr Erthyglau

14 erthygl ar y dudalen hon

- "tr5t: Original anlJ tltrttb.

^TGML STOBIES." .

THERii WAS.

Newyddion
Dyfynnu
Rhannu

They carry economy of labour and material to I Consiclerabit- height in America.. This beats phoneic ,)rin,in, 2 lovers sat benenth the shade, And I L:: 2 the other saidt How 14- 8 1 hat you bo 9 Have smiled upon this suit of mine! If 5 a heart it palps for you— Thy voice is mu6 melody— "I'is 7 to be thy loved 1, 2- Say, Oy nymph, wilt naarrytne? Tnen lisped the soft, "Why 13Iy." A New Yorker has invented a vacuum, but the authorities iu Washington refuse to graut him a patent on it. They say his vacuum is a bare-faced iufringpijion' on a dude's head. THERii WAS. A pedestrian on Fourth Street the other day came ncross a couple of small boys who were light- ing, nnd he "topped and inquired— nO) s, is there a principle behind this ?" You bet said the smaller one, as he loosened his clutch for a minute. I sold him one biie of II,Y harvest apple, and he choked hini-clf in trying to swallow the whole thsn^. The principle is, that he has got to shell out three more marbles, or I'll fight him to the List ditch. TOO PAETICUXJLR. I wish to report a case of larceny," she said. as she entered the police-station yesterday. Yes'm. When did it occur Last evening." At what place?" On a ferry boat, sir." What are the particulars ?" Why, I with a young—young man, and-" v()U were. Well, go on." And tell his name ?" Of course." And that I never saw him before ?" Cprtiiinly." "Then 1 won't report the case, sir! You are too particular, and the ring wasn't worth over S3 anyhow I" BKD-HBADKD GIRLS AND WHrn: HORSES. "flares r. red-headed jjirl tir,d there's a white horse." remarked Mr. 'John Matthews, the well- known sporting man, who was walking down Broadway with a reporter. Wliat'do yr-u mean ?*' he was nsked. Didn't you ever hear that before ? Every time you meet a red-headed girl you will see a white liorqe. ? Half-a-block further another red-headed girl was met. Where's your white horse now ?" asked the reporter. There's one turning the next corner," he replied and, sure enough, around the corner came a white horse drawing a druv. "They never fail, I tell" you. I have been saying,' Here's a red-headed girl and there's a white horse' for fifteen years. I've never eot left yet. After parting the reporter met one more red. headed girl, and, looking for the white horse, was not surprised to see a car pass drawn by two of them. A HUSBAND'S ADMISSIONS. He was on the witness stand, and was asked if he had ever struck his wife. Well, yes; I did kinder tap her once with a table leg." is that the only time?" asked the attorney. n): I did strike ¡'er on the arm once, which made it swel up a little." "Any other time?" I hit her with a poker once, but it wasn't my fault. I took the poker for to get a coal from the stove for to light me pipe, wiien the old woman come for me, and I held out the poker for to defend uiebi-lf, and she rau agin it pretty hard." Did you ever throw anything at her?" I heaved a stov-lid at her once when she come for me." It is charged that you threw biicks at the hc,u,e once; is this true." I threw a few bricks at the house once, but I didn't smash any windows, yer honour." The divorce was granted. THK ALDERMAN' AND THE OFFICES. Some time ago a new man was put on the police force. As he was a gawky sort of a customer, one of the aldermen undertook to make fun of him in the presence of a number of gentlemen. Now," said he alderman, ;would you salute an alderman if you were to meet him on the street after aark ? Certainly, certainly, I would. I would take off my hat to IlIm." '• That's right. I am glad to see that you are beginning to nn ierstand your duties. Now, sup- pose a cruwd of men were to pass you after dark, and you did not know who they were, what would you do if it was late, and-" If they were drunk and raising a row I'd let them pais." W°uldn't you attempt to arrest the disturbers of the public peace ?" 011, no! I would salute them very politely, for £ would be at least one alderman amongst tnrau^certain sure," responded the new policeman I he listeners, at whom the smart alderman had been winking, he expecting them to laugh, did laugn profusely. They held their sides, but the smart a.uermarr's voice id not ming.e with the chorus, as be bad somehow or other captured ft suspicion that he himself was the man they were smiling at.

THE DUCHESS.

UNKIND.

A SCREAMER.

'A SHAYING-SHOP SKETCH.

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THE LAY OF A CARDIFF LOUNGER.…

THOSE MEN!I

LIVERPOOL'S HERMIT MILLIONAME.