Papurau Newydd Cymru

Chwiliwch 15 miliwn o erthyglau papurau newydd Cymru

Cuddio Rhestr Erthyglau

17 erthygl ar y dudalen hon

TALK OF THE TOWN. .-

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- Early Welsh Nonconformist…

WORKMEN'S TOPICS.

._-__--..-CARL DUNDER,

MIRABILt DICTU

WELSH GLEANINGS. -----------

------------' THE REV. DAVID…

- - ---. --- - --CURIOSITIES.

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WELSH MUSIC AND MUSICIANS.…

THE LAY OF THE ORANGE PEEL

THE SOLUTION OF IT.

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Samuel's Sentiments.

Newyddion
Dyfynnu
Rhannu

Samuel's Sentiments. Samuel at a "Tea Fight." I'm a good reciter, sir, I don't know which I am best at, tragic or comic recitatione. but so versatile ain I that I can make tragic onesscream- iugly funuy, and the comic ones awfully tragic, at least I am told so. Do you know, I have seen the people o affected when I have given them a bit of my own genuine pathos that they have Id got up und left the place. I .fftict them so that they never come aud hear me a second time- they can'r. tand it. It was my particular friend the Rev Z Ichariah Snivellurn who last invited me to recite. His congregation at St. Quagmire's had begun to fali off, so he determined to have a tea fight," and to give those who attended real ham sauawicbes and jam tarts in addition to tbe UUal half- baked buns, currant cake (weight ot each lOèif, 2 cw.), and blue- looking tea. The Rev. Snivellurn got the tarts on an economic prin- ciple. He went round to all the principal parishioners and told them how they would promote their own happiness in another world by m. king lots of tarts for him in tbii. This brought in enough tarts to have fed a whole boy. school for a day. Dou'c imagine that the tart mnuiac- I turers didn't derive any benefit 'n this world they did, for Mr Snivellurn, wheu the tea was over, got up and said that the particu- lar thanks of the community were due to, cartaiu ladies (he named them all) for the exquisite skill they had displayed in the making of the tarts, and especially for the generous and lavish manner in < which they had dolloped in the jam. He could not have compli- .1 r- LIJOlU more nigniy ana delicately than by spying that they were ail real jam" themselves. (Uproarious laughter aud applause.) It was a regular gorge, sir. Most of the people who came had been saving nu their appetites for tome time, evidently. I except the young ladies, who, as you will doubtless know, never affect to have any appetite, because to eat a lot looks so unin- teresting. Ali went well, sir, except tht a fussy young man, whose hair was so flat down that it looked as if it had been fl .t-iruned, let & tea-urn fall and scalded his lower extremities jnost grievously. I remarked with a smile to a laoy who sat next to me that the accident gave n,e quite a "te.urn. I meant turn, of course (I don't charge extra for this explanation). Sue turned upon me and scowled terribly, and I found out afterwards that she was the fl LL-i,, otied young man s sister. One man, sir, hau thirteen cups of tea, with solids to match, aud, when he was told that there were no more ham sandwiches, be said that be wished he'd never come to such a 'privation do." It was afterwards found that he was a member of the Salvation Army, allù had found a ticket that someone ehe had lost. When the t» a was over, the Rev. Snivellurn said tl,t fie'd irlake a ,few remarks. He gave good measure, for his rernarke, Ia.st.ed three q u a r- ters of an hour. Then he call«d upon Mr Dismal Shaken for a recitation. A most tragic and sepulchral young man, with hair that wanted cutting very I badly, got up. He recited "Eugene Aram's Dream." It was more like a nightmare than a proper, leg, titnite dream. I was told that Mr SimlcKH invariably haa an enormous feed of pork and onion- washed down by a few glasses of ginger wine, prior to reciting this, in order that he migilt property realise the horrific effect of the dream. He would have got on all right .f he hadn't spoken as though he had a cold. He began— "T'was id the pribe of sutber tibe," 'I and went on at the same strength. He got com- pletely thrown out before his best bit cama on. iv tien he camfi tp tJ. line, is wob, woe, un- utterabifc wiis, whu spill life's sacred stream," there was A cothplote collapse, for no" "sooner had be said, "Woe, woe," than a hulking boy, who had been passed in by bis father—one of the churchwardens after tea, shwutedout 'Emma,' aud ail the rude p ople there laughed. Tnat hoy was put out—and so was Mr Shakes, for that mat- ter. lie was so confused that when be fat down he missed his chair, and sat down on the boards of the platform. I was < glad he was disconcerted,, J T uecause ± was LOJU inui he had what he would call "The Wibidof Bubbie's Head up h:s sleeve as an encore recitation. Then ws had a comic reciter. He was a working man, and he elected to recite in the vernacular. Bttt he was not very "QCC:>88fu1. Finally, he said, "I fhink I had better sit ,d.n\'IJ," and it is astonishing wha: a number ot people he found to agree wilb-bizii. Mr Snivellmn's curate, the Reverend S -.raggr% -Wdliaou, then got up and said it was a dei'ghtful eatheriiig, and that '• it w.-is very pleasant L) see so ma.ny happy "and smiling faces around, re- marks which I fancy lhave heard somewhere before. He was followed by a lady, who "alii" Earts aad Omes m several keys. A young man near me said her singing reminded him of the "bowling of the blast," and I only just restrained myself from say- ing sometmngeis? aoout oiasc in conjunction with howling. Then my turn came, sir, and I stood boldly forth—in the programme I may say I stood boldly fifth, bui no matter. I gave them a pathetic bit first. It was called Little Jere- stood boldly fifth, but no matter. I gave them a pathetic bit first. It was called "Little J ere, miah, or the Struggle for the One-eyed Bloater." It is.a beautiful thing, sir; I ought to know that it ii, because 1 wrote it myself. One man was so affected by it that he went out to fet.ch the doctor. Auoth' r went out and ordered coffins for himself and family (a contract job), and said he only regretted he hadn't given up the ghost before he came in, as he didu't care about dying a lingering and paiuful death. Well, sir, I was getting on ail right till I came to the line Dam your fceors, u:y gentle boy," when up jumped the Rev.* Scraggs Wilson, and said he must protest agaiasi such language before young people. He evidently n.ír.ttln1r th 'H""lonincy nf th n:.il.Ú"' c.u, -W" .t'\ t" stout lady got up and walked out. Whether it was the tea or my recitatiou that disagree i with her I don't know, but I suspect it was the former, for to my knowledge she ate least two pounds weight of currant c..ke, and youjeaa't carry that con.fort- ably unless you are madeot cast iroii. But an explanation ensued, and I went on to the end. Thf>v simply writhed, sir! the effect was so intense. They were too much overcome tifi appiiaa VeY much. I was followed by a gentleman who bad evi- dently comfl to knock SO to bpaak. ^t* wfu a man of fie. ee-and truculent aspect, .and .«« Sect to rouse us with "The Charge of the Light Brigade." I never realised the horrors of the charge so fully before. He nearly tore thetj/lat- form down, he was so earnest about the matter, 'I,d t.o f..£;i. '.Y went bl,ek in tile tl,lou burst H blood vessel, ldid, ready. He fixed L;s -,eye on a youi.g man with a squint, and fuidy. trans- fixed him. I am tpfd that lie so galva- nised that yonng- man that the Jat- ter lias--ne%ei, squinted since. Then I after the Rev S n iv e Hum 1. I I naa said a few final words, the chief purport of wliieh was that a collection would be made, I had another turn. I began to recite, "Gone with a Hand- somer Man," when a rude buy from outside shouted through the window, "Shut up^.old ugly." A woman in the back rows laiigfted so much at- this that she dropped her bsby on the floor, and there was a fearful bowiing, a,LxiLi -.tii the people rushed to see what was the mutterr T .tbcught it time to be going, to I borrowed Jthe nearest hat Icould find in tbe anteroom, and went home. SAMUEL; His SENTIMENTS.

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