Papurau Newydd Cymru
Chwiliwch 15 miliwn o erthyglau papurau newydd Cymru
8 erthygl ar y dudalen hon
FUN AND FANCY. 0-
FUN AND FANCY. 0- Viaiiesr: "Why do you make some of your sslaa xmmd and some of them square?" Wife: "Because my husband has been oom- plaining of saaisnass of his diet lately." "I ca-M take 100 words a minute," said one aitortfeaisd writer to another. I often take more iham that," remarked the other, in aor- jpowful aeze-sta; "but then I have to. I'm sutraied." Prøfessor (laroturing upon the rhinoceros): m I mv-st befr jam to give me your individual atteistjeo. It is absolutely impossible that j-ou C,"U1 form a truo idea of this hideous ani- nasl mnle,%a jws keep your eyes fixed on me." "Papa," said a little boy, "ought the Wiaster to flog me for what I did not do?" Certaicly mot, my boy/J replied the father. Well." ftiiid the little fellow, "he did to- &:3>j vrbsn I didn't do my sum." Sfesaiiraestal F5 >arding-IIouse Landlady: yes, this world is indeed a vale of tears; Ihere ia flew on tlxe r,,rrics, thorn on the roses Uasentimental Boarder: Yes, and In and hairpins in the soap." Bitter; "What have you got?" Waiter: I've got calrea' liver, sheep's brains, pigs' feet Diner: I don't want a list of yonr physical peculiarities; all I want to know » what you've got to eat." Lady: "1 do no like it when you preach, Mr. Lecicrjie." Mr. Lecterne (much pleased): "So glsad you appreciate niy sermons." Lady: YeL;, you see when you preach I slways get stwr-h a good seat." ■] "Why doers Mr. Jinks have such a hang- dog, vmcomfor&able look about hiunt Is it be- i cause, he is in financial .trouble?" "Oh, no. It Is boenose hç is the father of children of school age, a:d they hi? ve begun to ask him io help their* with their ariiinaetie." 44 How has Wilson been doing?" asked the J yeoman who bad just returned South A!rica. Well, he has n -dj a <»< :-d deal of ) money, but.—" "G.ftni on w. d, M he?" Ve«, he seemed io be ine along lirat-rate -irittH he tried to pass s<hi. of it." so to jfa v Goo<l-n!?;kt' I" re- marked an t:or.rvf.'cib.d vonng man at the front "I f- iti n my heart to «»y 1 Goo(7-;ii -!rf J s -ply— "Look here, ywmg «»»»n. it!?»•;■■ <> (>•<? 'the girl's father "if y„-i a l itie be abb; say ■ Good morning A aSatejwsBi made in good faith, but diffi- cult to aeeepf, was recently offered to his. congregation by a country pastor. He had bee it Isoldina forth c«i the'advantages of plain speaking. "Wljy, brethren." he said, bring- ing his h'tnd down upon the pulpit with great vigour, "there's no pefd of aft these long words and hiah-»ounding terms; not a bit. Look at St. Paid, I say His words were full of the meat of knowledge and help, and he didn't make use of any five-syllable talk. No, lie alwavs spt'ke in piai.11, nimple English, my brethren' ) Koddv was the clergyman's handyman, and his 'favourite resort was the barb r'ti shop. All of 'm'"suitdai» Roddy ceased visiting the barber's, and the clergyman asked him the reason. sir, i've quarrelled with him because he said things about you." "Indeed, I RO<ldY i And what was the barber t>ayu.<g | about "He iHid. '.ir, that your. heau was c'rackccj. "And Fm sure you contra- dieted bitr. said the yahmter, for he kne..v the barber's* love of jokitig. J'¡u, I couldn't <.111 iitjJ, sir, when hè\, bad your head in his h ¡tl\Ü S(J (.fira. 1 thoujiht he olght to know, tout 1 so angry al Itint telling everyone." The fieadnnstresa of a high school for girls took her pupils for a trip to the Lake District, and SPIlt them on by themselves to view a famous waterfall in the vicinity. She ex- pected them to be enraptured by the beauty of the fall, and was amazed when, in leas than half an hour, they all came trooping hack., looking very much disappointed. gins, how's thi*?" she cried. 1 didn't expect luU i back for hours ytt." "Oh, ma'am, we couldn't stay tnere. really," was the plaintive answer. It's so shockingly primitive and out-of-date would you believe' it. there isn't a picture- po.»t-eard shop in the v.ii.ole place!" He was romantic, but bashful for his age. At 25 it i,4 expected nowadays that a man vliotdd be 1 waiter of fact. 8he was his equal in romance, but a trine older, old enoiign in deed to bo a widow. The conversation had turned on the f' er important subject of mothers-in-law. There v.ss a lull in the argu- ment. (.lazing i'»rf she sighed and said • Ab 11W I <m» ill never have another mothei vi? in-law." lie looked at her With interest for a moment and then suddenly blurted out: .(Ii,, fi very young." It aii but he could not draw back. She threw heraelf into his ariiis sjnd thn have lived happily—up to now. Jinks; "How did you come to lose so much money on the races?" WLika: "Got too many tips before I started." A West-end bookseller tells the following wmusing »tory of a conversation he held re- cently with a well-to-do, but illiterate, client. "I n)ii-At have some books," the latter rc marked, axid went on tf byphun thrit he had found an emjuy library in a nouHo which he had pureliastd in Kensington. His only con- dition wa. the volume* should be hind- aome. The bookseller suggested that half should be bound in Kussia and half in Morocco. "What's to hinder you from having tue lot bound in Loudon?" want the unex- pected response." ce.] obson, I do believe that if you were given the choice between me and your pipe you would hesitate." "That's where you make a mistake, Mrs. Jobson. A pipe soothes and comforts a mam in his old age." She was an economical, industrious, and ambitions young wife, and often tried to per- suade her husband to give up smoking. One day she pointed out to him, in exact figures, how miieh he spent in tobacco in the course of a year. "And you would be better off," she said, "men tally and. physically, as well as financially, without your pipe." "But all great men have smoked," he urged. "Well, Sh0 said, "just promise me that you'll give op ,14moking till you're great. 111 be quite Btttiafied. -That fellow rejoiecs in the name of Slob- I laemi»aky." "I .don't believe it." H Honestly, that's his Stuac." ""Oh, I don't doubt that, But I dn:'1; bstieva hs rejoices."
ICAKES AD PUD DINGS. -No.…
CAKES AD PUD DINGS. -No. 38. A nice pudding &I) (I one appreciated by children can be made from the following iJi. gndint8, This is one of the Cakeoma prize recipes. PRUNE PUDDING. j Sent bv Mrs. Anderson, Kercsley. 1 5 O'Z. finely chopped lUet. 2 Kggs and a cinch of Salt. «a !1 packet Cak-coiiia,. 4 8 oz. Prunes.- The Prunes a-ukad overnigii.f in cold water and str&'m'd v. wan led lor use. METHOD :—Kub S Is Cakeoma; add »he I'nines. Eggs (well bcalaa). and MiJk, and iiabiiy but" thoroughly mix all together. Put into a well-greased basuri. tie with a cloth over, • and si-emu for, 3 hours. with I Cakeoms is soul in 3 £ u. packets by Grocers and Stores everywhere. Recipe Book will be seat post free, on request to Latham and Co., Ltd., Liverpool.
(..----POPULAR SCIENCE.''…
( POPULAR SCIENCE. -tti. ffois::t-: EyoiK?. a* i The ;».•; 07. & "ide t,) vv ':• pre-O'i! ,4 .••• -il t'i<- can joe he;:i'<! nulr' a r.:iio ;it". <i handicap ior trmv nn<?. Tii > s;:une ot.jeehoH applies Co aL .Aeroplane eugi'-ses. fsBPKTt'Ai. M'JTCO: A. •vr*i»ror claims virtu- motion •<ttuijui • He "was awarded a cut' tin- Liverpool lvx- liibubv:: (i!.)is2) fa-- a i- wbb-h has Juv?. wuuiid uj f. h p ivsrt: and is st ill f2 i r I A ion S C 3 that. for clock .V'i -\i Iir- nr.'iifiv hi vented is earth. Avilh.iul" .1 b.x'h-T- arid .« life cie-t on the '.liriiKHt f./iOi ionic;-s working of parts, wh :• are (I to hist S«»ventv years. iS'oT rr: r. nwd ill the old pri v. j.lmwri iv ihr ill us-, -.ratios:. A r, <y[' a she. pole 1 .'1 f tb0v-'iVt I'.jpr. and rav a o- ai: L' 1'■ 1 ..oi'. if iir.t- crteiad. \c -fv? to i- a pulley, u.-ieo f.>;■ li.-iK-iiig a ■■mi tno!«•••!) it-r.d np trie WJicii irat ins been hoisted. tirns CP,U;)E MAX I/FACTOR?,. "ori,n;Lf1 Hindis t!i:• rj'i* arid ladles t11el'no »iit of the pot. L: ft.M-* hi'.v a tr, b of water t d: the hasp. Tbe siioi t • >a<■<{>i ia fnerv iuvpi.Jar in; n. uiid rescmlik'ft gravel Shot. N<> e.toTt is made at screen- Dg or (?:y.iitg the TS;&E SYVTHMTNO MA<'UI>*», X c v; i i'ti in i a Di'ioica tfini a a a In n cl- n, v tr.j'M.i'M' >nt £ and weio-ua Ii eombiiKv; f>v t!:« prnieirjles of ■the catamaran, t!i.uj.'k" ao:\ the "|»iewk. iird enabl Y R!I:> a • :• t" TIJJItaster pro^ntlirongli tli« v/ai.c t- .by svohu- juiiiG'it can Ira ns^cl a ar, :y by a, person yrhv/ c;,i;.)ic! svirri, 'd aid. jjossi'ilc io It •• v relaiivalv io •; -lea a-a:. iri t.ha «vatt-r with:) tit exi; a nation. i .?•. udwev lies on ins KKW SV'. i M Mi >(! JIACHiNK. 1. ol, 'll" ■p c r.'o ra1 floaN. aad, « « HI the K!aa a|r £ ].i'da's as oa bieye; acre is a* driving Drae'isuiism v.-it!r the rei.r -float. 'Idicse The front flr>ai, swivclbsl a a d carries a fin frhieii netves as a r;adder. A wc.oda?) liar i?i (I NS; i,i siiit-r.lac so iha.t bv altei'iiiatfly piishi't? pn.ig oa tl;:s ;?• toe jiiiielro. OF ui :i -a.r./a varies, of course at dii'eien!' aifc«. ll;e v*1 yoiiih <»/ sf. c ii teen can li.i'i 2^0 poiicrls. jiy bis f penv (:; li via; ho -oinhi 'K* a jtower of 320 pounds, WIHIO his niaxi- his iinitietli or p<o:rais t!:e.i being r corded..N r. the e\"pi ra i'•>" of hirs fhiri y-fsrat yea»•>>. power begins to decliiie, very graon- ailv at tirst. falling Imt eiglit- piuiiids by the Jirae in is forty. t'r»ni fot-t-y to. fifty the de- crease is a t more rapid, to ti,, the latter of a of fit'tv, rtie.-efuve. being -dic'biiy greater tlian that f of t" p:v V. After lii'i-y the deer*L.,s>- in si -engtl? '• usar.ilv rapid, but th«- cl'Mceu^e va-i"- s^> sa racisi a-jdy in iti- divblanis rhat it lia1 been impossible to ob- tain accurate (lata t-i to average slrength after 1.1a.t age. fHIW 'GK AT"H IXC. AN A -.fcsf.or in the I'-a.iversity of Wisconsin flail s ,'o have dirfOT'-ivd how an echo can be j>hot"a.p'i-'d. The professor has made triar- v pici ui'cs of sounds, and the e&merft ysed ;i no ^»NSITLV<» i b•>I if the hand he held |)(.-fih<- lens, lnait.d air may fie ween t'ii I: it in bilhr.vs like smoke. As flniiis;. ha-s an sir-wave inollor., the principle ■»«po> i,4 aPR:O« t.t. xviti) one tfaou- ( :F,1 f,t {'h Si't'O:,J\l. t 1H alr-w;1.VC8 forma: t.i'rc!- tb<nv;nd fecr. in diameter one; «f!c<>iai >?Tta i>el' is s.fmet. In o releT to *h<< i r-w■■"i *'c for ih oiirneri the fiaih of i"nitainating it nin-t b-c so sharp tha-t j,h"r- ^vil! mi-tvt fno- aprircciable distance ^vMio :r bio'hi. iasfs. Vn electric flash is the <talv .Hjyht- M'TCCK'VIV.H' O'lict TO rncr't t-!r.s re- h'iuis < h«v abraist iuevedtbla «peed wd ic!i every thing rnnst 1* dorre LiJ jniaku p tl.i.s photograph, ean l»e "ap])reciated; ft, lias on!v io be «xplauted that the flash tri 11 f en-thonsaudth part of a second after the air-wave has started from the' bell.
»■ THE FILbST STEP."
»■ THE FILbST STEP. wuuJd j>rontot.e the progress <i< P^v" ih and tho cai:se- of friend-chip and gerund! among jaen are face to .'face • f- pr<<bi.etn of self discipline. CAST. W. A. Mdxriie..
[No title]
Don't throw away boiled starch when finished with in the laundry, but pour it in the water to wash oilcloth or linoleum. Be- sides making it look bright and clean, it will doable the wear. I After flannelette articles have been wacthed they should be rinsed in water in which loz. I of alum or sal ammoniac has been dissolved, This little precaution will make them non- inflammable, and may be the means of saving many little lives. If a child's hair will not lie straight do not < wet the brush, thinking this will have taie I desired effect. It won't. Whenever the hair dries it will be as bad as before, and this is very bad for the hair. Rather put a few drop. of some hair-lotion on the hair and brush it well. When heating irons by gas never place them on the ring, but get a piece of sheet- iron, place it on the gas-ring, and then put the iron on it. This keeps t4W, irons from I sweating and then getting rusty and spoiling the clothes. Combs should not be washed with water. This is apt to split the teeth. A stiff nail J brush is a good thing to keep for cleaning them. After using the brush take a d&mp cloth and wipe between each tooth. An inexpensive mixture for the whitening' of boards consists of equal parts of silver sand and fuller's earth. A little should be sprinkled on the wetted boards, before they are scrubbed, and after the scrubbing the boards should be well rinsed with plenty of clean water. To burn a candle without waste, get a cork the size of the candlestick and fit in the well, [ leaving about a quarter of an inch from the I tip. Then put a long needle, down the centre of the cork, so that it leaves half an inch protruding from the top. Then fix candle; I you will find it will stand quite firm, and can be burnt down to the end without wasting the. inch that is generally in the bottom of the candlestick. candlestick.
. BE OPSN-HKAKTED.i
BE OPSN-HKAKTED. If you want to keep young, don't try to keep up an appearance beyond your means. The continual strain and worry soon do their work. An inactive, aimless life, on the other band, rich, heavy diet, late hours, too little open-air exercise, all bring wrinkles and grey hairs. Be open-hearted. The oldest people at heart—whatever their years—are those who go about with a suspicious feeling that laugh or joke is against them, and that every little kindness is actuated by some ulterior motive. OrOM) COOKING MEANS HAPPY HOMES. It is a mortifying confesWon to make that marital happiness may depend upon the culinary skill of the wife, yet none the less is it a fact which cannot be gainsaid. That the straight-eat way to a man's heart lies down his throat is an old and oft-quoted proverb, while weare told even by poets that it is easier for civilised man to live without love than with- out eooks. A man may have the patience of Job, yet. it is not wise to try him too often with indigestible food. It is the bounden duty of every wife to care for her husband's comfort, and in these days of inefficient and uncertain domestic service, to do this re- quires a fair degree of culinary skill. SHOS DAKGERS. The danger of wearing thin shoes in wet and cold weather is obvious, and yet many •women make no difference in the thickness of their shoes, whether it is cold or warm, wet or fine, and many dangerous illnesses are caused through this foolishness. Shoes that are too loose should also be avoided, often being the cause of painful blisters and corns. Many people, after bearing the torture of a pair of shoes that are top small, go to the other extreme, arid wear those that are too large. When buying shoes, one must bear ia mind tnat kid is very pliable and soon stretches, ao that the shoes should not fit too comfortably at first. BKNBFIT OF LAUGHTER. Laughter improves one's health and looks because it improves the circulation by stimu- lating it, sending the blood bounding through the veins. This is the benefit of all laughter, if hearty enough it causes deep inspirations, calling into active use every part of the lungs, favouring an increase of lung power, and thereby developing a healthy chest. When the cheat and breast are lifted and expanded, the sagging, weeping willow lines of the face disappear. Therefore, laugh a little averf day.
--------' USEFUL BECIPES.
USEFUL BECIPES. MARMAXADB.—Get four Seville and tour sweet oranges and two lemons, and cut them into very thin slices, picking out the pipe. and to each pound of fruit add three pints of water (cold). Let them stand 24 hours, then boil till the chips are tender. Allow this to> stand till next day, and then to every pound boiled fruit add ljlb. of sugar. Boil until the svrup jollies, and the chips are quite ten- der and transparent. This may take fwom half an hour to one hour. The oranges axd, lemons should be washed, and all specks taken off before being cut up.
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