Papurau Newydd Cymru
Chwiliwch 15 miliwn o erthyglau papurau newydd Cymru
7 erthygl ar y dudalen hon
HINTS UPON GARDENING.i --+-
HINTS UPON GARDENING. --+- GARDENING OPERATIONS FOB THE WEEK.-Celery to be sown for early supply. A small pan of seed will be sufficient for the wants of the largest family for a first sowing. Let the soil be rich and fine, the seed to be very lightly covered. If the soil is reasonably moist in the first instance, it will not require to be watered till the plants are up. To prevent evaporation, lay a sqaare of glass over the pan after sowing the seeds. Rhubarb in the open quarters to have six inches of rotten dung heaped over the crown of each plant. Rhu. barb may be planted now, and old stools may be d" vided. Kitchen crops of every bind required for spr^g Bowing may be sown in very small breadths, and ,v"h the exercise of judgment as to the prospects of tb^we^" thsr. Cabbage occupying plots of ground wW-0*1 will ba required shortly for some other crop, may be taken tip and laid in by the heels in some out the way place till wanted for the kitchen. As he plants do not grow at all this time of the year, dor for several weeks to come, the ground they occnSy may be taken possession of at once, if required to be got ready for another crop. This remark appizei3 only to cabbages of a size fit for table, and that would probably be cut for the kitchen during Pebniar7 and the early part of March; store plants for planting out in spring must be left alone for the present. If any likelihood of re- quiring early supplies of summer cabbage, sow now a few of the early heaxting kieids in boxes or pans, and start in a gentle heft. At the end of February these will have to be pricked out into a sheltered bed out of doors, or, better still, into a bed over which a frame can be placed for a few weeks to help them on and protect from frost. Sow oauliflowers in boxes, and treat as advised in foregoing paragraph on cabbage, re- membering that these are more tender in con- stitution, and will require a little more nursing. Sow lettuce in boxes as advised for cabbage and cauli- flower. Peas and beans pushing through the ground need some protection both against frost and vermin. If the weather is mild and open, the best you can do for them is to sprinkle slightly with soot, or plentifully with wood ashes. This will keep off slugs and snails, which, if they wake at all now, are sure to search out tha peas and beans for breakfast. If the weather is cold and likely to be severe, strew over them any light dry warm material that may be handy-sueb. as chaff, waste hay, or even dry fine earth. In places exposed to the wind, branches of spruce thrust in aslant so as to overhang the rows will be protective, and may save many a promising piece of plant from destruction. Potatoes of early kinds that have made short, hard, purple sprouts in the full daylight may be planted at the foot of a warm wall, or in any other wall-sheltered and sunny position for an early crop. To force pota- toes it is only necessary to have a gentle bottom heat from a large mass of fermenting material, a bed of light rich earth containing a good proportion of leaf mould and charred rubbish, and some old frames and lights. Of course, they must never be exposed to frost or excessive wet; but as soon as the season is suf- ficiently advanced, they must have as much light and air as can be given with safety. It is not so important to protect the roots from the steam of fermenting dung'; in fact, the potato murrain may be engendered in a forc- ing frame by shutting the plants up close over a steam- ing hotbed. Roses to be planted as soon as possible. In light soils standards will thrive better if some clay is dug in with the manure. Roses on their own roots need a lighter soil than briars. Roses will never thrive unless the ground is effectually drained, deeply stirred, and liberally manured. Tulips breaking ground now are likely to suffer byfrost.: Heap cones of sand around them before the crowns open, and cover with mats on hoops while the weatner continues severe. Dahlias may be started in a gentle heat for cuttings. The simplest way is to lay the tubers on the soil over a tank in a propagating house, or on a bed of warm hoops or dung, and when the shoots are two inches long take them off and strike them. Hollyhocks in cutting pots to have a shift to 48-sized pots, and the soil to be chiefly loam. Keep them in the green- house or warm pit for a week after shifting, then they may go to a cold frame. Strong plants in pots may be slanted out. Annuals to be sown in plenty for early Magazine.
AGRICULTURE. --+-
AGRICULTURE. --+- Care of Poultry in the Winter. The following instructions on this subject are given the Illustrated Farmers' Almanack for 1866:— Being originally from warm countries, heat or ar varmth is indispensable to poultry, both as irds she growth and fattening of birds for the e, and also for the production of eggs. Cleanli- is another condition, without which fowls cannot e. In the summer months, when the fowls leave roosts shortly after dawn, it is usually found 'nÏtmt to give them dry grain for their first meal. .n winter, we would recommend that their first be a warm one; it sets them up, and makes comfortable for the day, and, besides, promotes The mixture we have found to answer best itoes boiled very soft, beaten up with sharps imes called thirds or middlings), and any pot or refuse bits of suet and meal, which the a may furnish, seasoned with salt. This will be ,d excellent food; potatoes are unquestionably nourishing, and the fine brans (sharps) is remarkable for its warmth-giving properties. Barley-dust may ",e substituted for sharps, or, what is still better, half Vy-dust and half sharps may be used. The rasp- bread, which can be had from the baker at a ",rice, may be used at times to vary the food. kitchen not produce enough of fat and tor. the worms and insects found in sed instead. A quantity suffi- for a week may be obtained '11 which it is boiled can sal, the liver can be -zed in thA food oaoh /ery morning in the Sage, or a turnip, or .apply—in the raw out the most delicate a their favourite bon. neat; it is good for -xlbtfnl, we should say, it. From the earliest dir latest day, such food And last, not least, pure > be forgotten; it must be in large quantities. In. ):11:1 the neglect of this in. ..ealth, a condition so easily iiat the neglect of it is quite intended for sale should be d large- quantities of grain jfiem than to the other fowls, g is required, ttl following will Put the fowls to be fatted into J. them three timet a day with s till it is quite soft and swelled ust as much as will satisfy them, Remove the feeding dish each 1 ighly washed, that no sourness e fowls, as that prevents them ai the milk of the rice to drink, t.,r It will be found that this method iteness which no other food can i considered how short a time is 'g, it will be found as economical or even more so. In five or six sufficiently fat for the table." of the Corn Trade. che review of the grain trade given -sh Agrimtlturist:- days of intense frost with a. slight during the past week, and then came and stormy weather. Farmers have 4 pretty freely because they could do jmg in the carting of manures or in field u the stackyards there is still a large quan. ow wheat, fully as much as is usually held at ton, and the quality is really fine, being well millers, though within the last two or three have not bought it quite so eagerly as they ly. The accounts from mast of our Scot- howaver, agree in stating that barley is JUt, and in some'districta—East Lothian, vren oat stacks are now not very plenti. 9 expected to be scarce in spring, and Mich may tend to enhance the value of Cattle disease may have some effect in icleB moderate in price, and though osing heavily, and even the nation at <ous loss from its diminished supply ill there is a saving of much grain and of other articles that would have been converted e into butcher's meat; and, moreover, we shall have a i larger breadth of wheat, barley, and oats sown this ( year than we ha-pa ever had before. But it should be 1 remembered t>a^ we have no overwhelming stocks in i any quarter of the globe; not much more than the crop of ISCo ta look to for our subsistence till another harvest iomefi. The prices of good wheat have been well eipported since our last at all the leading marvets, every decline quoted in the reports having arisen from the raw, damp condition, while in the south barley has rallied, and in our Scotch markets has advanced 6d. to Is. per quarter."
SPORTS AND PASTIMES
SPORTS AND PASTIMES As the Empress of the French is the leader of fashion we may expect that shooting will shortly be- come one of the pastimes of the softer sex, for at the Emperor's last shooting party at St. Cloud the -Em- press, Princess Metternich, and Viscountess Aquado each took a gun, and knocked over a respectable number of birds. THE Brothers Davenport have added a now figure to the cotillon. A male dancer is placed in a cabinet, built after their fashion, with a small hole in the uppar part of the door. As the ladies walk round each passes her hand inside to the prisoner, who tries to identify the fair owner. If he guesses right, the door is opened, and he claims the lady as his partner. MR. HEAVENS, railway station-master at New- market, has just been presented with a purse contain- ing £ 150, subscribed by several noblemen and gentle- men of the Tarf, trainers, jockeys, tradesmen of New. market, and members of the press, as a testimonial of their appreciation of his uniform civility and constant attention to business during the five years he has held the above situation. SOME of the principal clubs in Paris have deter- mined that all card-playing shall be for ready money, as playing on credit or for honour, by which men are lured on to lose tremendous sums that they cannot pay, has led to distressing results. We presume dis- tressing to the feelings of those who are not paid. A clerk at i860 a year lost X500 on honour the other night. Doubtless, if a question of honour were raised, a duel would result, and then which one would be shot ? THE death of General Charretie will throw a gloom over the military and sporting circles of which he was a distinguished ornament. From his early youth up I to a few months before his decease, a period extending over sixty years, the general was known as a first-rate horseman, a thorough-bred sportsman, and an excel- lent shot; he was, moreover, an amateur actor of great distinction, and often delighted the audiences at Cheltenham with his histrionic powers in the highest walks of the tragic drama. General Char- retie was a great friend of the late Earl Fitzhardinge and the Hon. Craven Berkeley, and was a most popu- lar member of society at the Queen of Spas, Chelten- ham. The general was a stanch and warm friend, a hospitable man, and a most cheery companion. WATERLOO Cup GossIP.-The Field has the fol- lowing comments on the forthcoming grand Waterloo coursing contest:—" Meg is reported to be doing good work, and likely to show again at Altcar next month. We hear that Mr. Gorton runs Butcher Boy, a promising puppy by Canaradzo, and he, with Har- mony, are gone to Bolton to be trained. We under. stand that Mr. Clarke's nomination will be re- presented by one of the Knotty Ash kennel. Mr. Bartholomew's nomination came with a rattle early on Wednesday, at Liverpool, and was backed to win a heavy stake. It is rumoured a Shropshire kennel will furnish the representative, but we have an idea a northern dog will be the one on the day. Isaac, although defeated on Thursday for the Member's Cup, at the Altcar Club Meeting, will, in all probability, represent Mr. Broeklebank, as he showed great pace ana cleverness. Mr. Blanshavd, we hear, has a second string in a dark, good-looking puppy, own brother to Ben Burley. Mr. Brundrit, after the running of Barlochan, at Altcar, will, in all probability, have to rely upon Black Topsy. Mr. Deighton and Mr. D. Lloyd are likely to be represented by En Route and Eyes Right. Lord Eglinton has a very promising puppy in Waterloo. Mr. G. Gregson has a fast and clever puppy in Faust, who will most likely run for him. Mr. Haywood, having such good trying tackle, will have every opportunity of knowing Regulus's racing capabilities, and we hear he is a clipper. Mr. J. Jardine will run Cauld Kail; this dog has run extremely well this season, and the party are -very sweet. Kitty Malone is reported to be very fit, and will no doubt go for Mr. Knowles. [Mr. W. Mather's representative depends upon a trial which is to take place upon an early day. Mr. Eandell has given up his nomination to the com- mittee, but we have not heard to whom it has been allotted. Mr. G. W. Stocker's nomination has been strongly supported, and rumour states that Mr. Ingleby's old favourite, Tamar, will represent him. Mr. G. A. Thompson has a strong team of useful greyhounds, and by the forward running of Theatre Royal and Tinkling Tinman at the Altcar Club Meeting, his dogs are sure to find plenty of friends on the day. Amongst the dogs which we hear are doing well, but whose nominations are not as yet decided upon, are Bonus, Liddington, Priam, Reveller II., Gaudy Poll (doubtful), Jack the Giant-killer, Harker, Johnny Cope, and King Tom.
LIFE AMONGST THE MORMONS.
LIFE AMONGST THE MORMONS. In the Divorce Court on Saturday, the case of Hyd& v. Hyde was introduced. This was a petition pre- sented by the husband for a dissolution of his marriage, on the ground of his wife's adultery. The petitioner, when a young man, embraced the doctrines of the Mormonites, and was ordained a priest. In 1853 he joined a French Mormon mission, and went to the Sandwich Islands. From thence he proceeded to the State of Utah, aad was married at the Great Salt Lake City to the present respondent by Brigham Young, tho high priest and governor of the colony. The marriage was performed according to the usual ceremonies of the society. He was then selected as one of the priests to go to the Sandwich Islands, but in his voyage there he became convinced of the un- soundness of the Mormon doctrines, and upon his arrival at the place of his destination he preached as strongly against Mormonism as he had previously done in its favour. He afterwards wrote to his wife, requesting her to join him, that they might proceed together to California, but she declined to accede to his wishes, telling him that he must either give her up or return to the faith of the Mormons, for she was more than ever convinced of the truth of the doctrines she had embraced. The petitioner then returned to England, and he was excommunicated by the laws and ceremonies of the society at the Salt Lake City, and the marriage between him and the respon. dent was dissolved. After this the respondent was married again to a person named Woodman. She had lived with him ever since, and there had been children of the marriage. Under these circumstances the peti- tioner prayed that his marriage with the respondent might be dissolved by the court. The first witness in support of the petition was Mr. J. Piercy, an artist, who said he had known the peti- tioner ever since the year1847. He had married the peti- tioner's sister, and recollected the period when he first embraced the Mormon doctrines. He was then quite youth, and he was afterwards ordained a priest. VViWigag had himself been a Mormonite at one period, but L^ had long since given up their doctrines. At that „ti»ae the Mormonites repudiated the principle of polygeny, but they had since changed all this, and at the present time polygamy was allowed, [and commonly practised among the members of the society. Witney had been to Utah, and had full knowledge of the tenets of the Mormons. He had often met with men who had six or eight wives, and had been in a room with five or six women, all wives of the same man. In tll.ct, it was the usual practice for men to have as many wives as they could afford to keep, except Brigham Young himself, who had pub- licly announced that he would marry no more wives who could not afford to keep themselves. Witness was quite certain that the petitioner was a single man when he married the respondent, and that he had never married any other woman. The women, when married, were not allowed to have improper connec- tion with other men, and adultery was always punished most severely indeed; it was said that they were put to death for such a crime. It was in the year 1857 or 1858 that the petitioner returned i to England, and he was now getting his liy- ing by editing a country newspaper, and acting as minister df a dissenting congregation. The respon. I dent's mother came over to England from Utah in the year 1864, and resided with witness while she was in this country. She often spoke of hej daughter'^ second marriage at the Salt Lake City, and he had 1 received many letters from the respondent speaking of her present husband, and the children she had had by him. There had been two children of the first marriage, but they were both dead. He was quite certain that the respondent believed the dissolution of her first marriage valid, and that she was justified in marrying a second time. Upon the subject of the Mormon Government, the witness said that Brigham Young was the Governor and High Priest, and that under him were two counsellors and twelve apostles, by whom all the affairs of the State were managed. Mr. Silas Martin Fisher, accoucheur, of the United States, stated that according to the evidence he had heard given, his opinion was that a marriage by Brigham Young would be recognised as a good mar- riage by the Supreme Court of the United States. That is, suppose it was a valid marriage by Brigham Young in Utah, it would be held a good and legal marriage in all the States of America. The Supreme Court would not have jurisdiction in any matrimonial court except the petitioner had resided in the State of Columbia. This, of course, was founded upon the supposition that the petitioner and the defendant were unmarried people ai the time of the marriage. The question of the validity of the marriage might arise before the Supreme Court Of the United States, and then it would be deciled that the marriage was valid. Utah was a territory of the United States, and the judges were appointed by the President of the United States, with the saiction of the Governor of Utah. Any laws passed by Brigham Young which were in- consistent with the fundamental laws of Congress would be invalid, bu otherwise the State of Utah had power to make its om laws. The evidence of ftts. Hawkins, the mother of the respondent, was read which she had deposed to before she left England lastyear. This evidence proved the first and the second carriage of her daughter at the Salt Lake City. Dr. Spinks appearel in support of the petition. His lordship said h< should reserve his judgment, and consider whetherihis marriage could be treated as a valid marriage, 'he question was whether a poly- gamous marriage accoding to the ceremonies of the Mormons could be coisidered in the same light as a marriage according t< the customs of Christendom, which in all countriesimplied that the husband and wife should cleave to me another, and should not be permitted to marry aiy other ? That was a marriage such as was reoogmsef by the laws of Christendom.
--THE JAMAICA MASSACRES.
THE JAMAICA MASSACRES. The following letier from the reporter of the Jamaica Colonial iStwiidard will no doubt be read with interest, being written free from the restraint previously felt whilt martial law prevailed in the colony:— "I have been so bisily engaged in the reporters' gallery of the late Hoise of Assembly, and with my reporting duties generaWy, that I have had no time to peruse the English papers to hand by the present mail. I have, iowever, lsen told that some have been writing in very disparaging terms of me, and my cor- respondence to the Golaiictl Standard, written when I was at MorantBay, th< scene of the recent unfortu- nate riot. I have. not seen these comments, but I am so assured. I dtsire nost anxiously to put myself right with the British piblic, and I take the earliest opportunity to do ;o. I was sent to TorantBay as special correspondent to the Colonial standard, at a period when that village was under sartiallawj the horrors and terrors of which I never aiticipaied. I saw men flogged and hanged for no jus causa, the former until their very blood formed rive courses down their backs; and every man, womar and child (at Morant Bay), my. self included, draded the very appearance of the chief actor (the Fovost Marshal) in these revolting scenes. In such ( condition of fear many atrocities committed there, although chronicled in my rough note-book, I feltthat I dared not have given in their true charack without incurring the risk of being handled vey roughly. Then, some of those who had been arrjted as political prisoners were my most intimaa friends. I was known by the authorities to be itimate with them. I then felt that I, too, might be-ie the subject of suspicion on the part of the authcities so, to avoid this, I thought the only safe come was to endorse, for a time, the many acts lawlesfy perpetrated at Morant Bay by the Provost Marshl. I was obliged, under the pressure of circumstances, t write a» X ■ because it was at my utmost peril tcnave attempted to find lauit; #ua yet I saw these arocities going on, and felt they ought to be laid toore the public. I had NO alterna- tive but to put tleai before the public in the manner that I did. It wa enough for me that the statements existed as record of the evil doings; and I looked forward to a tim of tranquillity and security, when the pressure woul no longer be upon me, and when I would be able trstate my opinions without let or hindrance. It wa too fearful a reign of terror for me to have attemptd to find fault; but, when I desired the public to knev that men were slain in such num- bers, that thqy iere being packed like sardines in a pan, I gave the ablio the information in a way safest to myself. So :lso with the case of George Marshal and others. I,.w that murder in the direst degree was perpetratedn Marshal's case. I told the sad tale in the safest wa I could, without getting my neck in a similar noosemd left the public to draw their own inferences; an( they accordingly drew the inferences I desired. I direct ydr attention to the case of Sergeant- Major Judah, ho succeeded me as special oorrespon. dent at Moran Bay, in consequence of my health having brokendown from exposure, and the fearful stench that pfvaded the place on account of the number of dod. people that were buried within the precincts of tl1 little town, very few feet below the surface of the found. That gentleman simply stated, in one of his ommunications, that the Morant Bay magazine was eft unguarded. He wrote that in the interests of tb Government, as he thought; and it gave offence tcBrigadier-General Nelson, and to his excellency the xovernor, and he was, 'in the most public manner (I quote from the official order), de. prived of his itripes and pay, dismissed from the volunteer servfe, and received a broad hint that, if martial law ha not terminated, he would have been treated as a rebl. "Martial lawhas now been raised. The British public have maifested a spirit that will make the authorities here)ause before they venture to assail the liberty of the abject, and make us feel more con- fidence in Britisl justice, and, were that possible, more loyal. Thus inpired with a feeling of safety, I hesitate not it declaring to the British public, that the atrocties committed at Morant Bay during martial law, by the Provost Marshal, under the sancion of the authorities, will cause a blush on maiy a British cheek when chroni- cled. I hesitat, not to say, murder, foul murder, has been perpetrated in the faoe of open day; and I fear not t) tell it, that Mr. George William Gordon has beet truelly slain by the authorities, not a tittle of legal (videnco having been adduced to warrant even his beiig placed upon his trial. I have always understood tlat British justice demands that the accused and the iccuser shall be confronted. But (I regret to record fee outrage) Mr. Gordon's accusers were seventy miles fway from the court-martial. They sent up affidavits, Wich the court-martial received as evidence. That is one dark feature of the solemn farce. Mr. Gordons fate had been determined long before he gave hmself up. Again, Mr. Gordon stated to the court,that Dr. Major, if sent for, would be able to testify aE to the cause of his absence from the vestry on the day of the outbreak; a ciroumstance that has been dweltupon very strongly as against him. This application waj treated with contempt. "I could go into nany points involved in the trial, to show the entire nnocence of the martyred man; but of that you and the public will be able to judge when you read the report of the trial sent bv the present mail to the Anti-Slavery Society. The public of Jamaica demand that an investiga- tion should be immediately entered upon, as to the causes of the outbreak-this they will have very little difficulty in arriving at-and the means adopted for its repression. Nothingshort of a commission wholly composed of the British element will be able to arrive at the truth. I shall bs prepared to give my testi- mony to the horrible butcheries I witnessed before such a commission, but certainly not before a local one, in which not an individual in the colony would have an atom of confidence. My opinions during martial law were the same as they are now. They were never changed. I was then shackled in the expression of my sentiments, not by the p-aper for which I wrote, but by the terrible daily examples I witnessed—so terrible, that almost every mm<seat one at Marant Bay thought of the J of his turn coming round, when he too would be visited with similar vengeance by the Provost Marshàl Some of her Majesty's JustICes f the peace were nigh being catted by the Provost Marshal. There were those to whom I could venture to whisper my thoughts and opinions, and upon them I can call to testify that I always gave expression to the sentiments that I now express. But what with the terrors of martial law around us) the system of espionage that existed, and directly after martial law the passing of an Act making it treason and sedition "I?, ^VS- expression to any thoughts and opinions antagonistic to the action of the Government, we were all forced to act the part of dissemblers, many other .r? °f the press included; but looking forward r^;™f !inse an,x.iety for the expression of British SKi? which hung the hopes of many, as the hfiln ^fflr>Ef /e0'S0d to them>expressed as it has been, sufficient to offer resistance to the tide of wrong « ?SSS £ Q 0n ^he Parfc of tkose in power. g Un<?0r. thes0 circumstances I wrote. Under far 1 now write; and if I at all fZL fnTJl ff 7°r pos?eaaing » natural dread, a desire to avoid the laceration of my flesh 15 by way of caution. Ah. and a noose placed around my neck. —I am, sir, your obedient servant, «-p ''A. W. H. LAKK, t( Tr. T -Porter, Colonial Standard. Kingston, Jamaica, Dec. 22, 1865. A correspondent-W. J., of Newbury-writes as follows :-Sir,-The following extract from a letter written by a corporal in the 2nd battalion, 6th Royal Regiment, now serving in the West Indies, may be accepted as uninfluenced by missionaries and humani- tarians, and for the genuineness of which I will vouch. The writer never imagined it would be seen beyond the humble circle of his friends. Fare West, Nov. 6, 1865. My dear Father and Mother,—I received your kind and wellcome letter, wich I was wel glad to receive it, dear father and mother. I am verev sorrey to tell you that when I received your letter I was jest returned from the war, wich as been verey hot on the rebel side. I must tell you that when the rebels broke out there was but 300 of our regiment in this place, and the rebels was to look at them about seven to one of us. But by theire suprise we slotered all before us; we left neither man or woman or child, but we shot down to the ground. I must tell you that I never see a site like it before as we taken them prisoners by a hundred per day-we saved them, for the next morning for to have some sport with them. We tied them up to a Tree and give them 100 laishas, and after- wards put a shot into their heads, and we taken the king of the rebels and hung to the yard arm of one of the British men-of-war ships. We captured all together from them about X700 from them so fare, but we are geten something from them every day our regi- ment what is rambling through bushe after the rebels. Dear father and mother-I must tell you that I never see such a sight before in my travels. I seen from 50 to 60 men shot and hung every morning of them. I must tell you that we marched throw rivers of water up to our shoulders for days and nights. I was 18 days and never taken my close or Boots off, and it was weet for 7 days. I could not get to exchange aney thing that I add on. I must tell you I was black as chimbley sweep. You may say that Farmbreough copse his nothing but bushes and brambles, but this was a great deal worse for bushes and brambles, but now, thank God, I am got back to my old destinatilla all right. My kind love to you, so no more at prodnl from your well wishen son, E. B."
" ONE THOUSAND POUNDS PER…
ONE THOUSAND POUNDS PER ANNUM FOR ONE POUND." The Press says the above announcement is one of the many offers which advciturous advertisers make to the unwary. "Any persons who may be desirous of becoming possessed of the above-named annual in- come are requested to make an immediate application, enclosing a stamped directed envelope," to a person who calls himself an" Esquire," and lives in a legal vicinage. Now, on the face of it, this advertisement is so absurd that one would think it impossible for the least experienced of readers to be taken in by it. If the advertising "Esquire can turn a sovereign into a thousand a year, there is no reason against his repeat- ing the process until be is richer than Croesus and all the Rothsohilds. Imagine an alchemist advertising that he has discovered how to transmute lead into gold, and offering to sell the secret for six stamps! uui 1110 Bkirange lauu iduim-. j.i t <1 TOa/xnipfi finds it profitable to advertise. We have ascertained the meaning of his advertisement. By an easy alchemy, in the replies which he sends to applicants, the "Esquire" is transmuted into a "Co." And tha"Co." begto inform you that they are engaged in the sale of the bonds of the Austrian Empire; that on the 1st of (not April, but) February there is to take place the twelfth drawing of the Austrian State Loan; and that there will be "eleven hundred premiums, amounting to the enormous sum of about one hundred and ten thou- sand pounds." They further state that, as a bond costs about £ 50, they have arranged to grant what they call "certificate shares," so that your small capitalist can actually make an investment of only ten shillings. How kind of the "Co!" The precise way in which one pound is to be metamorphosed into a thousand a year is nowhere explained in the pro- spectus, so far as we can perceive. It was hardly to be expected. The advertisement is necessarily more poetic than the prospectus, which, however, is very enticing and insinuating, and adorned with much em- phasis of phrase by means of capital letters. Its composition is queer, as the writer evidently feels doubtful whether he is a Co." or an "Esquire," and talks in one sentence of "our customers" and in the next of "-If countrymen." But the syntax of the bestower oi a thousand a year is above criticism. What precise class of speculators a lottery of this kind attracts, it is hard to conjecture. They are probably beyond the reach of our warning. Let us charitably hope that, whatever harm they may de to themselves, they will improve the financial condi- tion of the Austrian Empire.
FACTS AND FACETIAE. ■4
FACTS AND FACETIAE. 4 Good blood will show itself," as the old lady said when she was struck with the redness of her npse. When does wine sell at the highest price ? When it's made dearer. Oh, Madeira is supposed tea be meant. I'll not leave thee, thou loan one," as Mr. Hardap, who admires Tom Moore, remarked to his pawn- broker. Under the head of "Accident," the Boston Transcript chronicles the prompt arrival of a railroad train. A gourmand entered a restaurant at Ryde, dinner Is. 6d. off the joint. He consumed 51b. of mutton, thea went into the ham, and because his allowance was stopped by the waiter prematurely, took the rest out in broken panes of glass through which he let daylight. -A.U Irsihman, while fishing in a ^"as sud- denly caught in a shower of rain, which obliged him to take refuge under a bridge near by. <->n being asked if he expected to catch any fish there, he replied, An' shure, won't they be afther conun m here for the shelter? Soft Soap for All.0^ a lieutenant, call him captain; for a middle-aged lady, Bags her, and Say that you mistook her for her daughter; for a young gentle- man rising fifteen, ask his opinion respecting the com- parative merits of a razor; for young ladies, if you know their colour to be natural, accuse them of paint- ing. Thirty Years' PLirchase, Indeed!-The P-ev. William Whiston, of mathematical fame, predicted that the millennium and restoration of the Jews were close at hand. About the same time, having a small estate to sell, he offered it to a gentleman at thirty years* purohase. Thirty years' purchase! ex- claimed the gentleman. You seam astonished," said Wbistou, "but I ask no more for my property than other folks." I don't wonder at other people," re- plied the gentleman, ironically, because they know no better; but I certainly am surprised to hear Mr. Whiston ask thirty years' purchase, when he feels sure that in less than half that time property will be in common, and no man's estate be worth a groat." His Washerwoman.—On the road to Epsom a moustached youth, on the top of a drag, thus saluted a fat coachman, who was gravely driving his master and family. "Hulloa, you, sir? where's your shirt collar ? How dare you come to the Derby without a shirt collar?" Jehu growled forth, without lifting his eyes :from his horse "Ow the duse could I, when your mother has not sent home my washing ? During the fight at Fisher's Hill, at which the Federal troops were victorious, the rebel general Jubal Early, in riding to the front, met a man pitching to the rear. General Early accosted him thus: Who are you, and where are you going?" "I'm a chap- lain, going to the rear." Yes, curse you, you've been wanting to go to heaven for some time, and now when you ve got a chance you run away." Old Almanacs. We extract from the Dublin Warder the following remarks upon this subject:- Some archæoloist, to whose memory be honour given, got bound, in some year of the Georgian era, a dozen almanacs of the year of our Lord 1817. Besides the couvenienea they might have been to himself or his iriends, he unintentionally furnished us with in- teresting matter for this paper, and had he "left but his name on fly-leef, or inside of cover, it should here be mentioned in all respect. However these generally useful annuals differed from each other, they agreed in one particular, that of all being 11 printed for the company of stationers." Each consisted of forty-eight or fifty pages—price a British sixpence, we suppose. Great attention was paid in all to matters astronomical, either with a commendable view to improvement of the age ia science, or the more selfish and unwise one of sadl- ing the lieges with a fore-knowledge of evils, wliaa, after all, would probably never arrive. Poor Robin's Almanac," asserted by its conpi^r, "POOR R0BIN, Knight of the Burnt Island,' tobf the five-and-fiffcietia impression, assumed a m^isterif and jocular tone with his public. He first addres'" a note to his constituents, the purchasers exhorgg individuals not to fit the fool's caps dealtout to own noddles, or as sure as fate they -iore tVdry dunces intended. But if inattentive & this "let me be rather, to such stomachs f*ese j*tbsr a choke-pear than a gudgeon. I ad* i^cn more, but the Leg of a Lark is nr-0*' oetterthsa the whole Body of an Owle. Farewe1 • After this caution, the knight /Jn«"esoended tf reveal the names, eras, &e., of the ov«reigns of England, useful particulars connected the several-ounties of the kingdom, and rules fo'th" calculation of rever- sions. After this he set dr/n A f"11 sober**3 chrono- logy in one page of thirt-t^o lines, me reader can. see by the few here selerdd the comphenslvenes8 of the plan and the merit i. the verse- God out of Nothin-dM all Thwgs make 5718 All the World warurne.d t.° ora §reafc Lake > Julius Qcesar did.16 Britainsame5 1766 Dnnnriprinc mto Fn/Um<*> came; o4b First the Use 1 Murtherin* Guns began; 323 Brave MovJosse was ^^y ^ther-ed; 66 Eeverend^* Hewitt .ass nis iieaa, 55 The olffitie raged, erY sore at London; 50 Zondek burnt hereby were many undone; 49 The Crown a Anna's Head was plao'd; 15 She expirE"; and George's Head it grao d. 3 poor then proceeded to arrange his calendar. The day of the week were represented by <7, a, b, c, j, e-fm red designating Sunday. Opposite every iay was put ene of these, several portions of the frame, kpees, leg, feet, head, neck, arms, breast, bowels, thighs, veins, heart, &c., importing the prevalence on that day of the planet, or combination of planets, which influenced the individual member. A column vas reserved. for festivals, saints' days, law terms; and the next one for the phenomena of the seasons as they rolled, celebrated in such verse as Poor Robin had at command, e.g.: Jan. 2. The gardens now do yield no posies, 3. And men in cloaks muffle their nos(i)es. 11. A toast now plung'ed in March beer, 12. Being sugared well, and drunk up clear, 13. Revives the spirits, the heart doth chea.r, 14. And, had for threepence, is not dear." The compiler had evidently been ill-treated by the fair sex. He has a bad word for them on all occasions. Marriage is barely not so bad as doing worse, and that is all he can say for it. After relating the trouble and expense attending the birth of a child, in sugar-plums, wine-cups, hubberdine furmity, and fees for churching, he advises:— "April 24. Then let young people have a care, 25. Nor run' their heads in marriage snare. OA' a^k°' marriage drains the purse, 30. Better to marry than do worse." The genial month of June exhilarates the good man's spirits, and he gives forth a song in praise of generous liquor. We select the last verse, extending from the 25th to the 30th day :— Therefore water we'll disclaim Mankind's adversary: Once it caused the world's whole frame In the Deluge to miscarry. Nay, that enemy of joy Seeks with envy to destroy, And murther good canary." July reminds the master of affording some historical information to his pupils:- This month took name from Julius, Ccusar, Who was a monarch and and no Kesor. He conquered Germany and Flanders, And under him had brave commanders." The whole month of September is devoted to praise and abuse of the oyster. He credits the astrologers on this occasion with speaking truth, as- "They affirm, and with good reason, That oysters now do come in season, ■, By which we may prognosticate > < Scolding will be at Billingsgate." December he distinguishes by the titles of the games then popular:— At Irish, tick-tack, most at thrice, At passage, hazard, plays with dice, At trap-trip, doublets, draughts, or chess, Their money runs with carelessness." In a column devoted to moral apophthegms in verse there are interpolations of eccentric personages, not honoured with notices or days to themselves in modem almanacs. We select a few whose memory was green a century and a half ago: "Kissing Abigal, Hobbadeboody, Black Bess, St. Tyborne, Da Vail, Mother Shipton, Madge with a La-nthorn, Mother Redcap, Doctor Faustus, Fryer Bacon, Squire Ketch, Mahomet, Derrick, Hudibras, Bradshaw, Simon Magus, Phelps, Charon, Guide (sic) rw? ■50V1^ °f Edmonton, Arthur of Bradley, Dirty ml' ^antagruel, and the Witoh of Endor." I he moral observations among which these names are Bet, like plums in a pudding, generally tend to promote a selfish care of one's own comfort, bad wives being the rocks ahead throughout, and good draughts of sack and canary the objects worth living for. Poets by profession meet with much contempt from their brother poet, and the beggar's condition is painted in rose-colour. But, however occupied giving advice, or repeating trite morals, he returns and re- turns again to his Bete Noire, woman:— A woman's tongue Is like the opeaD- Still ebbs and flows, Always in ótion; 1 ;■ But yet herein A difference grows- Her tongue ne'er ebbs, But always flows." It is difficult to get anything out of the prose column of moral observations worth, or in many cases fit, for quotation. The whole spirit of it is cynical and indecent to the last degree. "Get and have money, or wretched is your fate." If he advises youth against debauchery it is purely on account of the loss of money and health that the caution is given. No inducement is held out to virtuous habits. The few extracts which follow are about as harmless and useful as can be got from the twelve columns of prose wisdom (November.) Toast and ale are much commended this Month by modern physicians for an excellent Breakfast, and a Rib of Roast Bef for Dinner; but those that cannot get it must shift with a dish of Sprats or Herrings. • riHeJLhat ma,rries to live a pleaaanter life thereby, is like the man who bought a fat swan, therewith to make a goose pye. Wave (ware ?) Horns, you that would not willingly wear horns. The surest way not to be a cuckold is never to marry. 1 "If all were hanged that do deserve it, the Hang- man might furnish the Broker with a whole Wardrobe of CJoaths."