Abergavenny Chronicle

For causing unnecessary sun'ering' to 52 sheep, Hie Great Western Railway Ctmrpany were fined £34, including cods, at Long- ton (SttaSbrdahire). "The summons, handed to me whilst in an aeroplane, blew away when I went up, and I did not know the date to appear," said Major C. Cooper, R.A.F., a 'motorist, fined at Kingston (Surrey). During an appIica.tioR for an ejectment order at Scarborough, where so much dis- tress was caused by empty houses during the war, it was stated that it was now alt impoaaible to get a houae there.

TH!NGS THOUGHTFUL I It is wise to forget past errors. F&ith ought ever to be a sanguine, chocrfuj thing-; and perhaps in practical life we could not give a better account of faith than by saying that it is, amidst much failure, I having the heart to try again.-IF. W. Robertson. It is only necessary to grow old to hec<<*DS more indulgent. I see no fault pommittcd that I have not committed myself.—GoetJie.. THE INEXTINGUISHABLE FLAME. j Youth, however eclipsed for a season, is undoubtedly the proper, permtajnent and geiiuine condition of man; and if we look closely at the dreary delusion of growing old, we shall find that it never absolutely succeeds in laying hold of our innermost convictions. A sombre garment, woven of life's unrealities, has mulled us. from < our true self, but within it smile's the young man whom we knew; the ashes of many pcri&h.abte things have fallen upon our youthful fire, but beneath them lurk the seeds of inexting'uL-<hable Same.—Haw- thorne. One in our faith, and one in our longing. To make the world within our reach, Somewhat the better for our living, And gtaddcr for our human speech. —Whittier. THE SECRET OF HAPPINESS. I That happy state of mind, so rarely pos- se,;s,c,d, in which we can say "I have enough," is the highest attainment of philo- sophy. Happiness consists, not in possessing much, but in being content with what we He who wants little, always has A man's own good breeding is the best ECL-uriV against other people's ill manneia. —Lord Che&terneld. THE DUTY OF HAPPINESS. I Happiness is a duty, quite as much a duty as truthfulness, honesty or good temper. There are many scripture words which ex- hort us to rejoice. We are to live a songful life. There are in the scriptures many more calla to praise than to prayer.—J. R. Miller. UNITS. I We see human heroism broken into units, and say: "This unit did little—might as well not have been." But in this way we might break up a great army into units; in this way we might break the sunlight into fragments, and think that thia and the other might be cheaply parted with. Let us rather raise a. monument to the soldiers who.-e brave hearts only kept the ranks un- broken, and met death—a monument to the faithful who were not famous, and who a.r6 precious, as the continuity of the sunbeams is precious, though some of them fall un&een and on barrenness.—George Eliot. So long as the streams run down And as long as the robins trill, Let us taunt Old Care with a merry air And smile in the face of ill. Sunshine ia delicious, rain is refreshing, wind braces us, snow io exhilarating; there is really no such thing as bad weaker— only diilerent kiilds of good wca.th.r.-John' Rtt-'kiu. I MAN'S LIFE. I Like to the falling of a star, Or as the nights of eagles ar-c; Or like the iresh spring's gaudy hue, Or silver drops of morning dew; Or like a wind that chafes the ncod, Or bubbles which on water stood: Even such is man, whose borrow'd light Is straight called in, and paid to -night, The wind blows out; the bubble The spring entombed in autumn lies; The dew dries up; the star is shot; The night is past; and man forgot. —Henry King. THE GARDENER. People sometimes talk as if the blessed Master only got fruit out of us with a pruiiin' -kniie—always standin' over us, an' a-cuttm' here an' a-loppin' there. Why, bkss His name, sunshine and showers ajid the gentle south winds have a great doaj more to do with a bunch of grapes than prunin' -knives have. We do want a prunin' now and then, I dare say; but don't 'e go a-tJiinkin' about the dear Lord as only standin' over lib for that. He's a-standin' there -v. tll a'l His kindness and care. Why He is trainin' the branches, and is watchin' over us, and wardin' off blight and keepin' off enemies- 81ugs and snails, and such-like—that do tharbour in a man's eoul; and His gentleness and levin' care have a dead more to do wjfh the fruit than the knife has.—Mark Guy Pearsc (in Dan'el Quorm "). There is one broad sky over all the world, and, whether it be blue or cloudy, the same Heaven beyond it.—Charles Dickens. Every right action and true. thought sets the seal of its beauty on person and face; <'very foul thought its seal of distortion.— Ru&kin. FRIENDSHIP. Friendship is not a mere sentiment; patriotism is not a mere sentiment; it ia based upon a principle, upon the principle that leads a man to give more than he de- mands. Similarly, friendship is based not merely on affection, but upon common ser- vice. The man is not your friend who is not willing to serve you; and you are not his frienw unless you are willing to serve him. And out of that impulse of common interest and the desire of common service arises that noble teeling which we consecrate as friend- ship. Friendship must have a machinery. 1'f I cannot correspond with you, if I can- not learn your mind, if I cannot co-operate with you, I cannot be your friend, and if the wortd is to remain a body of friends, it 'must have the means of friendship, the means of constant friendly intercourse, the means for constant- watchfulness over the '-common interest; not making it necessary <«' make a great effort upon some great occa- sion to confer with one another, but to have an easy and constant method of con- ference, so that troubles may be taken when they are little, and not allowed to grow tmtil thev are big. I never -thought if I had a big difference with a man that I did not find when I came /into conference with him that, after aH, it was but .a little difference,, and that if we were frank with one another, and did not too much stand upon that great enemy of mankind which is called pride, we could come together.—President Wileon. PRAYER AND GOOD LOOES. I Prayer will in time make the human countenance its own dHinest altar; years upon years of true thoughts,tlike ceaaeleaa music ? ahut up 'Within, will Tibra.te along the nerves of expression untn the lines c'f the living inatrumertt are dra'wn into corre- spondence, an?d the Rarmony of visible form matches the unheard =es of the mind. -J ames Lane AHen.

CLUB WINDOW. I "I love music much," Paderewski onc< said, "but I Jove my country far more; and the one boon I ask of life is to see Poland rescued from her poverty and slavery "and restored to freedom and prosperity." Sir Harry Lauder on one occasion at thf old Tivoli was being called upon by th< audience for an encore. *I Lo'e a Lassie, Harry," shouted an old gentleman, leaning out of one of the stage boxes. "Then y'ought to be ashamed to own it before all the fowk," was Lauder's retort. ? < General Sir William Robertson began his Army career as a private in the 16tb Lancers. "A holy terror," junior omcers call him. Discipline is his fetish, and woe betide the inemcient officer. He is a man of few words and strong views. The following is a typical etory. An important military proposal was being discussed at a confer- ence. Long-winded speeches had been delivered. Then Sir William got up. "Gentleman," he eaid, "it won't do. We ean't have it." They didn't. <t The Bishop of Winchester was a cricketer long after he became a bishop. On one occa- sion when he was at the wickets the bowling was so wide that he remonstrated: Please keep the bowling in the parish." The next ball struck him on the waistband, where- upon the bowler jocularly exclaimed, "I think that's in the diocese, my lord." t Mr. E. S. Montagu, Secretary of State for India, is a Jew, a son of the millionaire banker. Lord Swaythling, whose name was Samuel until he changed it by deed-poll to Montagu. The Secretary for India was educated at the City of London School, and took his degree at Cambridge University, where he waa noted for being a hard And systematic worker, and won a reputation for cleverness in argument. "It's a pity," remarked one youth after one of their political discussions, "that Monty doesn't come on our side in politics; I'm sure he would sit on. his own arguments like a thou. sand of bricks. As for us, although, of course, we know we are right, we know precious little about it." o- A man once asked Mr. Carnegie which he considered to be the most important factor in business—labour, capital, or brsflns. "Well," he answered, "which do you con- sider the most important leg of a thfee- legged stool?" The tallest men that ever lived are sup- posed to have been Hindus, who bestrode elephants ae we do horses. -LheVreeks also had tall men, the heroes at tee eiege of Troy having easily thrown stones which their descendants could not move. The "Daily Graphic" tells an amusing story of Major Augustus John's experience with an American interviewer. The reporter wanted the famous artist to talk about his so-called allegorical picture of the Peace Conference, but Major .John, following hie usual custom, politely but nrmly declined to discuss his art. Nothing daunted, the "pushful young particle" from New York's street of ink produced a notebook and a fountain pen, and with an encouraging smile exclaimed, "Now then, Mr. John, sit right down there, and jot down just any- thing that comes into your brain-pan. And, say, don't worry about the grammar and punctuation. That's my job, andf-I'lt put you wise if you make any slip in your com- position." He evidently had an idea that euch matter-of-fact things as speltjng and grammatical expression couldn't be expected to exist side by side with the artistic tem- perament. Needless to say, his kind con- sideration didn't affect Major John's de- cision, and he was politely shown the door. <t The story is told that Sir Eric Geddes, on arriving in America at tHe age of seven- teen, mailed back to his people a cheque they had sent him in order to give him some little af until he found work, declaring that he was determined to be ab- solutely independent. Sir Basil Zaharoff, who has given £25,000 J to Oxford University, is ea-id to be worth .84,000,000. He is a, Greek and a bachelor, about sixty-five, whose wealth is derived mainly from shipping and banking. < Lord Wolscley received .825,000 from the nation for the Ashantee War and .820,000 for hia services in Egypt, while Lord Roberts was rewarded with tloo,ooo for his ser- vices in the Boer War. Marlborough re- ceived no less than .6540,000 in estates and grants for his. campaigns. Wellington was granted a pension of .82,000 a year for two generations for his nret Peninsular cam- paign. This was ultimately increased to .84,000, in addition to which Parliament granted him -8100,000 for the purchase of an estate. After Waterloo the nation also bought Strathneldsaye for him at a cost of 9263,000, in addition to which he received .860,000 as his share of the prize money. Nelson was awarded .85,000 per annum, pay- able in perpetuity to all and every one of hia heirs male, as well as <-810,000 by the East India Company. Mr. Rudyard Kipling once wrote to & firm of typewriter manufacturers the fol- lowing testimonial: "It's a dandy. My greatest joy in life is to rise early and oil it. I can do poems en this machine with- out the trouble of thought. I just start something at the nrst line, pull open the throttle valve, and go out for a walk round Rottingdean. When I come back I nnd a poem of any desired length com- pleted, and the machine flushed and happy, waiting modestly for my applause." Lord Sinha, Uuder-Secretary for India., is not only the nrst' Indian to be made a peer, but also the first Indian to receive a poet in the British Home Government. The son of an obscure Bengal village land- owner, he was educated at a Mission School. A succession of scholarships enabled him to get into college, and without influence and backing he rose to the foremost posi- tion at the Calcutta Bar. He is now recog- nised as one of the cleverest men India. has produced. < What will become of the Kaiser's pic- tures? He had no fewer than nineteen un- doubtedly genuine works by Rubens, which may very well be worth a million of money. Among them is the wonderful "Holy Amonlg '? now in the Palace of Sana Souci, Famiy, no- in the Palace of Sans Souci, near Berlin, also "Mars and Venus," which hangs on the walls at Koenigsberg. Co Lord Birkenhead, as Lord Chancellor, is also the Keeper of the Great Seal, the silver die or mould from which the actual wax seals are made that are attached to the most important public documents. For- merly there was a special omcia.1 attached to the Great Sea!, caHed the ChaSwax, who&e duty it was to melt the wax and take the impressions of th<< seal as required.) When the old silver die becomes worn out it is given to the Lord Chancellor. The per- quisite is eagerly sottght after, for the seala are not only great rarities, but they are ex- tremely valuable, costing on an average ? .E400 to .8500 to make.

OTHER MEN'S MINDS. I The League of Nations is the greatest I eifort ever made to lead the world out of the paths of war into the paths of peace.— Lord Bryce. A TEACHER'S CAREER. I I want .Sunday-school feachers to inSu< ence the children's mihds in favour of a teacher's career.—Mr. H. A. L. Fisher. I THE POSTMAN. I I suppose a postman can be called an ordinary working man, although I know he often believes in high collars and low wages.—Mr. Jack Jones, M.P. AMERICA'S "DRY" NAVY. I A ballot of American naval officers would be unanimous in support of prohibition.— I Mr. li. Daniels. I THE MINER'S RIGHT. I The miner is entitled to spend as much on creature comforts as any other person in the I country.—Mr. R. SmiIIie. THE MINISTRY OF HEALTH. I I hope the Ministry of Health wIU not bt: satisned with the low standard of health attained by the panel dector.—Lord Knuts- ford. AIRMEN'S WORST ENEMY. I Fog is much the worst enemy the air I navigator has to face.—Major H. E. Wimperis. HOUSES AND HOUSEOWNERS. j Owners must improve their houses, but the need for improvement is very often not I their fault.—Mr. Edwin Evans. WOMEN IN THE CHURCH, t The attitude of the bishops towards women's ministrations in the Church is one I of great sympathy.—Bishop of Coventry. SCIENCE FOR PREMIERS. ) I vish to emphasise the necessity for the I scientijic training of Prime Ministers a.ud I Ministers downward. —Lord Leverhulme. THE BUDGET/ ) I am disappointed that something has not i been done by the Budget to directly relieve the middle classes.—Major Pretyman New- I man. WHY? ) Why should a man who works and pushes I his business be penalised while the man who lets things go easy escapes paying the excess pronts tax?—Mr. H. G. Self ridge. THE DIFFERENCE. { The only essential economic difference be- tween <arly Christi?njB and modern socialists ia that the former did voluntarily among them-sclvcs what the latter demand should I be done compulsorily by the State.—The  Bishop of Oxford. UNFORTUNATELY. I War taxes have a nasty way of becoming ? peace taxes.-Commander B?Uairs, M.P. t A SPORTSMAN. The British private soldier went through I the bad time laat Tear as if it were only a game .of football.—General Sir Julia-n Byng. GOVERNMENT COAL. t It may safc!y be prophesied that Govern- 1 ment standard coal will be as unpopular as Government b&er or standard tea.—Mr. Harold Cox. A MILLIONAIRE'S CHANCE, j There is a, fine chance for eome philan- thropic mililonaire to build dwelling-houswI fo? the working classes in Outer London.— Mr. Forbes Lankestcr, E.C. ALL BRITISH. I Employers and employed &re, after all, of I one common British stock.—Mr. G. H. Roberts, M.P. I CUTS BOTH WAYS. Just as the rich have no right to rob the poor, so the poor have no right to rob the rich.—Mr. J. R. Clynes, M.P. I TOO PEACEFUL. Some people are so peaceful that I would.. I sooner live in a one-acre neld with an angry bull than with them.—Mr. W. M. Hughes. THEONEISON TOUCH. Admiral Beatty's manoeuvre at Jutland was audacious and almost foolhardy, Dut one which Nelson would not have dis- clairtted.—Admiral Touchaid. BIGHTS OF THE WORKERS. I The children of the workers should have the best possible education, and the workers should have security of employment, with a, living wage and a voice in the control of industry.—Biehcp of Lichneld. THE TERRITORIAL FORCE. I We have now enormous numbers of war- trained veteran soldiers, versed in every aspect of war. To rally a proportion of these men while a spirit of comradesl.np pre- vails, to draw them into the reconstituted Territorial Force, to give them the best com- manders and the best weapons and the nncst organisation at our diep&sal is the task immediately before us.—Mr. Churchill. ? UP-TO-DATE DOCTORS. I The tide of modern medicine has swept on I very fast, and medical men need to be kept, I up-to-date.—Sir George Newman. NEWS AND READERS. I The craze for news is growing', and the appetite of the reader for more sensational news is likely to become keener.—Viscount Buruham. CHURCH ATTENDANCE. I Everyone has been struck by the decline I in church attendance, but there has not been a corresponding moral decline.—Rev. R. J. Campbell. 1 I TO SAVE EUROPE, t All the countries in Europe are exhausted by this long war, ouf own energies are diminished, our own resources are very much restricted. If Europe is to be saved it will be saved by the united efforts of all those countries which were associated in the war.-I,ord Robert Cecil, M.P.

COSTLY VANITY. I The "Buenos Ayret Herald" tells of < recent instance wherein it not only cost the vain person some gold, but also much trouble. This man was a jeweller, and the one responsible for his trouble was a clever rogue. The latter, dreaeed in priestly garb, visited the jeweller's shop and asked to see some gold ornaments which the self-styled priest said he wanted to give as a present to Archbishop Romero, together with the robe contained in a parcel that he carried. The shopkeeper showed much interest in the latter, and the owner opened it, revealing an elaborate robe. jhc visitor suggested that the jeweller go to the rear of the shop and try it on. He quickly accepted the invi- tation, and as soon as he turned his back the bogus priest swept up all the trinkets in sight and ran. The shopkeeper pursued him, shouting "Thief!" The police, seeing the excited man in the archbishop's robe, arrested him as a lunatic. By the time he had convinced the police of his sanity the thief had escaped. The robe, it was learned, had been stolen from the pro- perty-room of a theatre, as were the priestly clothes of the clever thief.

THEIR BROTHER'S KEEPERS. Chinese procedure in criminal matters is distinctly interesting. Every man is held responsible for any crime he has personally committed; but, if ho prefers it, the criminal can take his punishment by proxy. If a man commits a murder, and flies the country, no serious attempt is made to pursue him. Instead, the law comes down on any convenient member of his family who has remained in the neighbourhood, and punishes that member in lieu of the real culprit. This appears rather an odd proceeding: but as the Chinese religion inflicts everlast- ing torments on the soul of the man who deserts his family in the hour of need, the system is not without its merits. Anyway, the scheme works well in practice, and the fugitive is generally sumcie!ntly honourable to return in time.

CHINESE JUSTICE. I The more one h&ara about Chinese justice the more one is disposed to respect it. Herf ts a case in point. Not long since & ponj belonging to <t cavalry eoldier in Hangcho wandered away out of the barracks. Coming to a calf which had been tied to a tree, tht pony began to play with it. But the calf getting alarmed at the romps, lowed loudly and its mother, answering its cry, charged a1 Lh? unfortunate pony and fatally wounded i) with its horns. The soldier reported the jffair to hie captain, and claimed damages from the owner of the cow for the loss of hif pony. However, the captain took anothe: view of the matter. Holding that the cow had acted from a natural maternal instinct, and that the soldier had been to blame for permitting his pony to stray, he lined each of .iis company of fifty men 2s. apiece ir Chinese coin, or .65 in all, and made up out :f his own pocket the other ;E5 needed to buy a. new pony for the regiment.. He thue punished every one, including himself, as E warning to them all to be more careful u l1t.nre.

TAUGHT BY PHONOGRAPH. J The strangest school in the world has been 'stahlished by a woman. It is a school where parrots are taught to speak by means of the phonograph, which is a- new method adopted by the founder of the school. The old way of caching parrots is tedious and unsatisfac- tory. The tutor, crouched in !t corner out of ;ight of the bird, repeat-ed to it over and over thousands of times the same word, the same phra&e, till his back ached from his cramped n,nd motionless position, and till his voice cracked and g:-bve cut. The new way of teaching these birds to talk is pleasant and wonderfully successful. The tutor sets his phonograph going at the parrot's ear. and th<ui retires to read or to took after other business. His phpnograph, while he rests, works for him. With pre- cision and perseverance that he could never equal, it drums into the brain of the bird the sentence that is to be learned. This sentence thH parrot acquires much more quickly and much more thorough! v by the new way than by the old.

TEA AND COFFEE DRUNKARDS. I Moderation in t.ea and coffee drinking is as essential as moderation in the drinking of xlcoholic liquors, if one wishes to keep body and nerveR in good condition. As a matter of fact, there are medical men who assert that excessive tea and eoiYee drinking hns the same effect upon women as is experienced by men who over-indulge in intoxicants. Dr. Menas S. Gregory, head of the psycho- pathic ward at Bellevue Hospital, New York, advices the brft)hi worker, the sick mother, and the labouring man to be moderate in the use of tea, coffee, and intoxicants as stimu- lants. They play a most important part in the causing of nervous diseases, he says. "In iifty per cent, of the cases7 that come before me," says Dr. Gregory, "these stimu- lants are found to be the contributing cause of their mental illness. Not a few women I have examined here from ti\lle to time have admitted to drinking ten or twelve cups of tea or coffee a day. "Almost half of the 3,500 patients ex- amined at Bellevue last year for insanity were women. The number of these men- tallyi-deif-cieiit women have increased con- siderably in the past few years. Excessive tea and coffee drinking, it is certain, has a tremendous ill-eR'cct upon women possessing a neurotic taint."

I THE SAFE SEA. t It is a. curious fact that sixty per cent. of a.U accidents happen while the victims arc at home, or in the street, surrounded by familiar things. Perhaps the safest place on land or sea is the deck or cabin of a first-class ocean liner: and another exceptionally safe place is a car- riage on an express train. All this is so clearly understood by acci- dent insurance companies that they can afford to double the compensation when acci- dents occur on railways or tramcars, and some companies will insure commercial travellers at rates considerably lower than those charged by general accident insurance fompa.nies. With a light heart a man may undertake a journey round the world; but should hf have the temerity to hang his own pictures. or walk down his own stairs, great care and vigilance should be exercised. And the explanation is that, when going on a journey, or entering upon a hazardous undertaking, a man, almost unconsciously, exercises special care; whereas, while he ia at home, or taking exercise among familiar scenes, he relaxes his vigilance.

To the memory of each Birmingham 5cout who fell in the war it is proposed to plant Q. tree in !o-xl park. AU his life Mr. William Husaey, 77, parish clerk, has lived in the same cottage 9,t Hughenden, Bucks. 'Calebs the stipend is .?290, sa?'s the ) Bishop of Worcester, he will not grant a. Hcense for a curate to any parish in the diocese.

ï FUN AND FANCY. "What are you taking for vour cold? "Make me an oner." "My eon wants to marry your daughter Can she cook a dinner?" "Yes, if your BOlt can give her anything to cook it with." It If you please, kind lady," the beggar said, "I've lost my right leg——" "Well, it ain't here! retorted the lady of the houae, and slammed the door. Councilman: "I've come to see, sir, if you will subscribe anything to the toWB cemetery? Old Resident: Good gra- cious! I've already subscribed three wives." The Parlourmaid: "Lor', cook, what makes your nose eo red?" The Cook: "Glowing with pride 'cos it's never found poking itaelf into other people's business." "Pa," asked little Willie, "what's the meaning of the prophets of evil '? "I suppose, my son," replied Mr. Eidder, "that that's another name for the 'wages of sin.' thought you didn't object to a man who talked shop." "Not in a general way but this fellow is an undertaker." Mr. Luvlv: "I see old Goldman has died and left just over three million. Wouldn't you like to be his widow?" "Mrs. Luvly: "No, darling. I would much rather be yours. New Footman: "I always took thinga fairly easy in my last place." Butier: "Well, vou won't be able to do that here. They keep everything carefully Joeked up." Nocash: "Why don't you pay your debts? You've got the money." Slowpay: "Y ea. But You've got the mon4e y I shouldn't have it if I were to pay my, debts." Mother: Now, Dick, if you are disagree- (b!o to your little cousin Muriel, she won't tome and play with you again." Dick: "Io 4hat a promise?" "And did your parents leave you any- thing when they died?" asked the kindly sympathiser. "Yes, sir," answered the little tad sadly, "they left me an orphan." "This magazine looks rather the worse for wear." "Yea. It's the one I lend to the tervant on Sundays." "Doesn't she get tired I,f always having the same one?" "Not at til. You see, although it's the same book, It's always a different servant." Diasatianed Householder: "Do you mean t6 <ay that this meter measures the amount of Ms we burn?" Gas Collector: "I will enter tnto no controversy, sir; but I may say that the meter measures the amount of gas you will have to pay for." "I want a pair of the best gloves you aave," said Mrs. Nuritch at the glove Munter. "Yes, ma'am," replied the polite talesman. "How long do you want them?" ''Don't git insultin', young iii--n! I want to i)uy 'cm, not hire 'cm." Dibbs: "Do you be!ieve that there is reallf Mmething which can invariably teU wheu a. man is lying?" Higga: "I know it." "Ah! Perhaps you have seen one of tile- [tM.trum'ents?" B-iggs: "Seen one? I riod one'" Judge: "You say this man was at the per- formance last night and that he took aim iii-d iired an egg at yc.u?" Actor: "Yes, your honour." Judge: "And was it bad?" Actor: "The egg was, your honour, but the aim wae act." "Is your husband in favour of daylight saving?" "I think ao. He sbys out so much a,t night that I think he'd really prefer not to use any daylight st a!I." Agent: "This vacuum botHe will keep anything hot or cold for ssv<.uty-two hours." Mr. Tipples: "Don't went it. If I have any- thing worth driukiug I don't want to keep H seventy-two hours." Arc vou sure vou love me pH said ø" "Arc you sure you love me?" said a.. pretty girl to her admirer. Love you schoed the smitten one. "Why, darling', IvhiJc I was bidding you g'ood-bye in tae- porch last night your dog- bit a piece out of bhe calf of my kg, and 1 never noticed it' all I got home." "Can't you assume a Httle more pleasiag expression of countenance'' the photo-" s-rapher. "Y-yce, sir," hesitatingly amnvered. bhe aittcr. "Wa.it a minute and I'll take off' bhese new shoes." Pianist: "Scanning this piece of music. makes me feel like an aviator." Friend: "How's that?" Pianist:, "I'm trying to. tonquer the air." I

< Look Youpg! t W A youthful appearance is a valuable J everybody and no one appre- í elates tlÍø tt more keenly J woman. In business. social and' ? private life it will always be?o your udvane to look young-to wear ? "the rose ot youth." To preserve & ?  fresh and youthful appear.- j' ? <mce, It ia imperative that your ? ? <tiBeation ahootd be active ai?d ? t efficient. Nothing will make you ? :J look aickiy and faded sooner than v the liability to any form of imdigeat- J tons whetliler such arise frova t4Le Ion. stomach, liver or bowels. tke ) &EECHAMS! ?!LLS { j wiU satisfactorily ensure the hannon- ious working of the digestive system. They will bring to the tized and  stomach tORe and J vigour; they wiU prove to be a < vaJuable stimulant to and á their splendid aperient qualities will á J have a beneficial influence upoia tle j bowels. Owing to the blood-purifying ? properties of Beecham's Pills the m complexion Is soon wonderfully injuproved siod takea on all the á iKrettiatlbte charm of Itealth. If, J theierore. you  to10 Ok young J and feel young von may rest assured that tn thJLa respert Be,.Cllam,s rilla ? t. win Help you. { t SoM everywhere t in boxes, labelled ls-3d and 3s-0d. <