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Chwiliwch 15 miliwn o erthyglau papurau newydd Cymru

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OUR SHORT STORY, j u ' 1 v…

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OUR SHORT STORY, j u 1 v J.\ A Û t'r.\ THE HAPPY FAMILY. 1 B? RADCLIFFE MARTIN.' j It is a remarkable thing what diners motives induenca people in getting engaged. Sometime.-} it is pa-ssion, sometimes money, ."ometims family, someftmes adesire to íÓOW the oilier girl that cjomeou-e will have you. Albert Jukes got engaged because the motor-bus swerved and he sat on a young lady's knee. "Ought to have been the other way about, miss," said Mr. Jukes gallantly. The girl giggkd, and- as was only natural, Mr. Jukes pargued the subject. When th,J girl alighted, he alighted and insisted that utter tne awful shock he must see her hone. "My duly," said Mr. Jukes humorously, "if vqu'd Sat down on my knee like that I should have expected you to see me home." WhiiO they reached the girl's abode she explained that they were having a few friends, and a bit of music. Would Mr. Jukes- come in and be thanked? He was •fluttered and entered1. The girl was only oie of tiicse girls who v/ill just pass with a b:g hat, a fur, and silk stockings. Still. was a girl, and she mad e a fuss Qf Mr. Juke, and her mother said that there Weri) very few really polit-3 young men like Mr. nowada ys. So he had accepted an invitation to supper the next Suaday even- iog before he quite knew where he was. A moith. later Mr. Jukes was a friend of the household, and could drop in when he liked. Mr. Cobb, invariably addresoed as "Pa," wiri a gentleman with a most decided temper. Mrs. Cobb was a lady with. aa oqusllv weil-develope-d temper, though cau- tious towards her husband. The daughters seemed to take after both their parents. Still, as acquaintances they were passable, and Mr. Jukes kissed them all with fiao impartiality as opportunity serv-xl. Now, in order to keep "Ila" Cobb in good humour it was customary to p'ay every evening a game called "Hap-oy Families." It is a weird amusement, in which 1 players try to procure complete families of card-t, and intelligent lyings sometimes the ever.ing pursuing Mr. Bones, the butcher, Mr. P-tte, the chemist, and Mrs. Dibbd, the grocer's wife. Now "PuP Cobb was past grandmaster of "Happy F,)miliej." He knew as if by art magic in whose hand MM Bases. the butcher's daughter. and all the revt of them re- P,). He would go the round of the table piling up families like a sultan. Not onlv was he an expert, but it was considered .right and proper' that he. should win. Stfuno'ers, Who collected" families with too great a^sidoity were kicked under the table and otherwise warned that it was net the P a" pre-e,,Yt?;- thing to trespass on "Pa" Cobb's pre-emi- jirete. Mr. Jukee never minded Mr. Cobb win- T, "I He had no ambition to possess happy families himself. He was a perfectly happy bachelor. So it came as a shock to him one erening n Mr. Cobb, after collecting triumphantly the Bo net, the Potts, the Bibbs inG'- the re,-t. and remarking as usual that it was a great game to develop i_ ntelli- ??DC?. turned to him and began to converse ?bout the best place for buying furniture, "I'll give yriii a better tip than 'ire pur- chase, my boy," said Mr. Cobb. "I know a 'oie;ie furniture dealer. I'll take you round to his warehouse when you're ready." He allows me a commish of 15 per cent., and that'll be my wedding present to you." The astonished ?,r. Jukes said 'hazily that he was much obliged. Of coarse he ought to have explained that be had no in- tention of marrying any or all of the Mi--c-, Cobbs, but it takes much moral courage to declare oujtright before a large family that vou'd see yourself in Hanover before you'd mirry one of them. "Albert," said Mrs. Cobb <!jEPectK.nataIy. Pa has bad his game you can go and "it with Millie in the front room. You needn't tight the gas stove. Young love doa't si-ed a file." Shanecaced'V Mr. Jukes stole away with his toirle that was to be. She kissed him when they were alone, and he endured it with such grim passivity that even Millie Juices was struck by his lack of enthu- siasm. ■ "You don't think Pa's' makiwg more than 15 per cent., do you? He doesn't." He'll get nothing at all unless the dealer stands h.'n a drink or a eigar. Of course, strangers he would make a bit out of, but Pa's not the sort of man to rob his sen- ia-iiw. Mr. Jukes said sadly that he had never do;rbtpd the honesty of Mr. Colbb. "You're making good money. Albert, aren't vou, on thotse munitions?" was Millio Cobb's next remark. Reluctantly Albert admitted this. Little boasts of his about wages and overtime cirne home to roost. "It wont last," said Mr. Jukes darkly. "You are a one to look on the dark side. Pa says tin's war'll last five ygars yet. Of course, there's no reason for waiting in these times. We might got bombed any day." For one moment Mr. Jukea longed for a fleet of German aircraft rj?ht everhfLid.  the dccratep?" "Did T. hear kissing on the doorstep?" cried Mrs. Cobb playfully as the young c?u?e said ?ocd night. Had she listened for-arother minute she might have heard cursing down the road. Mr. Jukes did not know what to do. He had told Mr. Cobb in an inflated mom rat what he had put in War Savings Certifi- cates. if he tried to get out of the engage- meat he knew that Mr. Cabb would rejoice in a breach of promise case. He thought desperaielv of leaving his munition work arld g-eing into tne Army, but he was cer- tain that the Cobbs would insist oft an in- stant war wedding to get the separation allowance. Thero seemed no way out of his dilemma. He had to trust to luck. Then fate, which has a deefd-ed sense of Iwnour, plav-ed another je"t on Alb-:Jrt Jukes. One- night he was boar-ding a motor- bus when his hand slipped en the rail. The conductress threw her ami round him aud just saved him. "Thanks." said Mr. Jukes, adding gal- lantly, "Ought to have been the other way i -nan's arm round the lady." "Don't want to give evidence at. any in- quests," said the girl smilingly. Albert saw that the conductress was a verv pretty girl. so takmg the teat nearest the tUor he baa to talk to her. She seemed conver- sational'.v inclined. Do ii- this for a boy in Fiar.cc" inquired; Mr. JuseS.. Sot me-doiy.g it for a girl an England —and that's me. Got sick of ^eing behind a counter all day." "Jolly heavy job, isn't "Oh, I dent mind, but it's desu. y walk- ing home when you leave tiife garage half-past eleven For two pins Mr. Jukes would have volun- teered to see her home, but he w.:s due at the Cobbs' that evening. He knetf" that if he did not tu^n up a deputation of Cobbs would come round to hia lodgings to see if ■he had been blo-An up in a munition acci- deal. He had once missed an evening be- fore. and it taught him what a. sharp eye -tHe Cobb., kept on prospective sons-in-law. At last he reached the Cobb mansion. Millie opened the door for him, and he ]ltiF..ved her in the passage—at least phyg-, al i" he kissed Millie Cobb, but mentally he kis-wd the pretiv conductress. J "Go into the front room, Albert. Pa's ju?t finishing his fupper in the :(ibn. jti.it Ifi?n? ;sliing hic, f- .pper in the 11-C' I r--?,id y for lfappy 1'va i ,e-; v--r,v aoon, Strange was it that Mr. Jukes's polite ex, pressieus of enjoyment of this loathsome pastime had caused the family to Tggard him as a Happy Family fanatic. we're n'.arri ed," Millie Cobb bad confided to I I him, "I'll never grudge you going to play Happy Families with Pa three or four nights a week." Albert Jukes was alone in the front room. He saw the pack of cards on the table, and at the sight of it a great idea ca-roe to him. He gripped the pack, took our ceitain cards, of which he beat the corners, and others which ho marked with pencil. lIe had juot finished this interesting work when Mr. Cobb came in. 0 EVCTliiig, Albot-t," said Mr. Cobb, and theu roared, "Girls' 'cr'g Albert waiting. Where's your manners' Ma, leave theuj stockings. Charles, y.)u cocie pretty quick, yourg man." In a moment all hurried in, and sevei sat down to this delirious pastime. Mr. Jukes became a, unscrupulous as any wicked baroret playing bridge with all innocent girl in a novel. He waited till Mr. CobVs eye was on kin:, aid then glanced at hie; neighbour's cards. L.iok in frcrt of you. Albiijrt," said Mr. Cobb. rt;vanie as me. you take no n,e, The game began, aad all at oreo Mr. Jukes shone is a master. He collected the Bines' and the Di'obs' families in a trice. Millie kicked him hard UHdpf the table. He k-;e?,(,4 i,Lm ?,trd tt;dEr t'?p He growing redder- aud redder in the f&ee. Rc?ardie? of thi. he went OR and gained the families of Mr. Potts, the ehemist, and Mr. Bung, the brewer. An awed silence like the pause before the breaking of the hurricane reigned round the t: ble. Under the table so much warning kicking was going on that it was like an embryo foot- baU match. The unfortunate C'narl-es. mis- calculating hi* distance from Mr. Jukeo, kicked Mr. Cobb litni.elf tnd-liid his ears boxed for behaving like a mule instead of playing ths ?ame. Mr. Juki's shine re- mained impervious to all hfnt? An ?t oncc, !n"l one great victorious ^woop, All CO{lfCW all tho gr?a*, Viet-ori,')Oti coflcc"4 ai4i st-?(>4d ccp-- "AU tho lot." cr"ed Mr. Jukes. "It de- velops intelligence this game, dr:t jt" As k? spoke he, under Mr. Cobb's eye, straightened a bent card. o look at them cart1>" d,mandcd Mr. Cobb. With shaking hands Mr. Jukes handed theM ever. "Ycu dirty cheat!" brcke out Mr. Cobb. "I see you look at Millie's cart's, but I thought it was, accidental. You w-js hit alone with them cards and vo -,i marKed eTn. Mr. Jukes looked as shamefaced as pos- sible. h '•Err!" said disgustedly, as he threw- the cards .,it!. the dirty cheat., that's what you are. Wont to nor^v a girl o' mirw Id sooner se:* 'er ia 'er coffin. Out of this 'or.se before I wring your As Mr. Cobb made an indignant rush round the tab'e, Albert Jukes darted fick, "I the room, turned the key in the dcor, snatched his hat and stick, and departed. As he left the house the window was thrown u--i. "Let me set eyes on you again and ru kill you. Let me 'ear of your speaking to our Millie and r;1 quite kill you The next scene we must locate in a bod- rooui. It was 11.30 at night, and Mr. and Mrs. Cobb were retiring to repose. "I tell you that you was a bit 'asty with that youn? man," said Mra. Cobb. "I mu-?t say 'e was engaged to our Millie, aid she'll 'ave all the' trouble of getting another." "Don't you talk to me," reared Mr.. Cobb. "A man as '11 cheat at cards 'd borrer money from 'is father-in-law." "Well, I s'pose it's all for the be.-it, but I can't forget 'is desperate face as he went out." At that precise moment Mr. Jukea was Waiting outside a bus garage, and was re- warded by the appearance of the pretty con- ductress. "Hallo!" said Mr. Jukes. "Yen saved my life to-day. Got to see you safe home after that." "Gtft along with you," said the maiden merrily. "I'm going to get along with you," said Mr. Jukes. "I'm not going till you've apologised to me for .putting vour" arm round me in a 'public street. What would you say if I put my arm roirid vnu •■fraiet?" The girl was gaflly .sareastic. "I'd like to see you do it/1 she said. Mr. Jukes had the presence of mind to take this remark literally. And looking forward we can see in the future one more haftov family—Mr. Jukes, the munition-maker, Mrs. Jukes, the muni- tion-maker's wife, and Miss and Master Jukes, their offspring.

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